My family is falling apart and they want to bring me down too

[Voguester]

I should say that I'm 25 yrs old and I still live at home with my family, I am planning on moving away next year to another country (it's very exciting and I can't wait). The thing is however, at the moment my mum is going through a lot with my older sister, she is almost 30 and has a severe drinking problem and is also addicted to prescription meds. There is CONSTANTLY drama in this house and I feel like I'm right in the middle of it because whenever my sister goes off the rails and gets drunk, falling over and trying to kill herself...my mum gets emotionally stressed and always relies on me to help her.

 

I hate to sound selfish but I just don't want to be here anymore, I would be happy to move away and ignore it all because I have been through this with her for years now and I need to live my life and be happy. My family actually went on a trip this week without me, I think my older sister guilted my mum into it but while I was here by myself, it was amazing...there was a real sense of happiness and peace for me. I then get all these calls last night from my mum saying that my sister got really drunk and fighting with people, was making a fool of herself so she has to come home today early, I also get several calls from my dad who I haven't heard from or seen for about a year trying to get me to answer the phone and I just refused to answer, I want NOTHING to do with any of it!.

 

My sister has moved out to stay with the father of her child (she has a 6 year old daughter) and it is a lot better at home because prior to that she was getting drunk every night and telling my mum she was going to kill herself, we would have the police and ambulance around at our house - it was an absolute nightmare...I would just lay in bed awake thinking 'oh god, not again...'. Im so tired of it all.

 

Sorry I really needed to vent, my family is coming back home today and I'm just not looking forward to it at all, my mum is going to be wanting to talk to me extensively about it all and stress me out again too. I can't wait to move next year and I guess I just need to hang in there for a little bit longer.

[freeindeed]

Hi Voguester,

It's funny, i just posted about family situation.... I too have an irreverent drug-addicted "sister" that is selfish and is only concerned with herself. When I finally left the living situation, my life got better. I wish hers did too, but it didn't really. I'm glad you are going to be able to move out of the country next year, I hope it changes your life (for the better) and gets you out of the chaotic family situation you're in. It's so sad when 1 person in a family single-handedly can ruin things for everyone. It's so selfish. Well, feel free to vent as much as you want on here. Can I ask, where are you planning on going next year?

[Voguester]

Hi freeindeed, I read your post too and I thought 'wow this is so similar to my situation'. Yeah my sister is actually ruining other people's lives and mine included but I'm not going to let that happen. I feel really bad for my mum and my little sister, I'm sure it's going to be a bit of a struggle for me to actually move out next year because I do love them very much and I worry about them but I know they will be fine, my mum just has to try and not get too involved with my older sister's issues which is hard for her, she obviously cares about her.

I'm actually moving to canada next year where my boyfriend lives, im very lucky to have him and he's sort of the light at the end of a dark tunnel right now.