Does he like me?

[Youngandready]

So I've been attracted to this gentleman that works at my complex for about a year. We've exchanged business cards and phone numbers. We've written several emails to each other that usually consists of small talk. We've never hung out before. We also park in the same area so we randomly pass each other in the mornings and evenings. I've noticed that if it has been a long time without seeing each other (3-5 weeks) he will purposely park beside me. He always does this. I've never asked him if he has a girlfriend because I think I'll be too devastated. I know I should just go ahead and ask him but I'm too scared and the other part of me thinks that he'll deny it. There is also quite a bit of an age difference, he's 34 and I'm 24. It doesn't bother me but his reluctance to talk to me on a consistent matter leads me to believe that he may have a problem with the age. I may mention something about an older artist and he'll say things like "you don't know anything about them, you weren't even born". So things got a little hot and heavy in our last emails exchanged but he never responded to my last one. He compliments me when he sees me and also remembers things that I've told him in the past. Is it safe to say that he's just a heavy flirter? Or maybe has a girlfriend? I can't tell. Guys--your help is much appreciated!

[DylanNotorious]

This was written by another poster called DN and I think it applies to your situation

 

Any woman who refuses to 'chase' a guy is missing out on many opportunities. It's a very unwise thing to do and explains why many women are unnecessarily lonely.

 

Of course it's not going to work some, or even most of the time. It doesn't work some, or even most of the time for guys either. To explain non-interest or rejection simply on the basis of "I chased him and that was my error" is using totally false logic because it assumes that he would have chased you had you waited and ignores the fact that not everyone you are interested in is going to reciprocate that interest.

 

The theory makes it easy for women who lack the the courage to chase and be rejected but it reduces their chances of finding someone. If women can do anything a man can do then they can do this as well and they should not retreat into being somewhat infantile because it doesn't always work.

[mactownman]

Sounds like he might be interested. However, there must be a reason he is not pursuing you. What was the content of the "hot and heavy" emails?

[Youngandready]

Well, he was helping me with my fantasy football league. LOL. And then he said something about he would provide lessons (football lessons) to me free of charge. Then I said "As long as those lessons are free". Then he said "Free as long as what you learn stays between us". The whole conversation was a huge innuendo about me being the student and him being the teacher...that eventually started about football, but then turned to something else...if you know what I mean.

[DylanNotorious]

Why don't you just ask him out? What do you have to loose?

[Youngandready]

I think I will. Should I just ask him out for drinks? If so, should I pay since I invited him? Forgive me but I haven't dated in awhile. I've been in long relationships so I haven't had much of a dating life. I try to get help from my dad but he's almost 60 and of course he's pretty old school so it's not the same.

[oldenoughtoknow]

Ask him out for a drink after work. Since you're asking him, you should offer to pay, at least for the first round. If you stay for more, maybe you can trade back and forth. You'll know what's up with him fairly soon - I hope you haven't put your other dating prospects on hold due to this guy.

[mactownman]

Gotta love sports talk > pseudo-sexual innuendos.

 

Out to drinks would be good. Personally, I would like it if you cooked up something good, knocked on my door, gave me a little smile, and asked me if I wanted to come down for some dinner. However, keep it light and non-sexual. It shows general interest and you would be able to tell alot from his reaction and how the evening progressed. Either way, you would be able to proceed, or not proceed, from there.

[dough]

he likws you

[Youngandready]

@ Mactownman--its actually an office building complex. I like where your head is though I would have totally cooked for him already if he lived in my apartment complex.

 

Dough--thanks! I thought so, it's just hard to tell some times.

 

Thank you all for your help! I plan on asking him out next time I see him. Wish me luck!

[Youngandready]

@oldenoughtoknow I have not put my dating prospects on hold, but I'm not seeing any one at the time. Just enjoying me

[MD Geist]

Don't be shy about it just ask him out!

 

He's already showing a bit of interest. Keep it simple though, if you two have never hung out before that should be the first date. just have something in mind if not ask him out to coffee.