She's seeing somebody else and it bothers me...did I do the right thing???

[Hamster123]

I guess I should give a bit of the back story as it's not as simple as you may think...

 

I started seeing the girl in question around 2 years ago. Things were going great and I really started to like her a lot. After around 6 months I asked her what she thought about becoming more serious, and she basically got very defensive, told me she doesnt like the thought of serious and doesnt want a boyfriend as she's scared of getting hurt again. After this she distanced herself from me and things pretty much fizzled out from there.

 

Admittedly I was pretty down about the whole thing, but carried on life as normal. Then around 3 months after things between us stopped, she started sleeping with a good friend of mine. This absolutely destroyed me when I found out. I was upset, angry, confused...everything! Although I wanted to say something as I thought it was completely out of order I bit my lip and never said a word to either of them.

 

They slept with each other on and off for quite a few month, then one night, a full year after things between me and her stopped, I got a random text off her saying this...'Ok Im just gunna go for it...what would you say to me if I asked you if you wanted to make another go of things. I wouldnt blame you if you told me to piss off but I just think I'm ready for a relationship now and wondered what you thought?'

 

I was completely shocked. Although I still had a soft spot for her, I told her that I did really like her when we were seeing each other, but I know that she's been sleeping with my friend which I really don't like, and that I was going travelling for the summer so it wouldnt work out anyway. She replied saying 'yeah I wouldnt date me neither, wise decision'. So I went travelling quite happy in the knowledge that she realised she messed up and that she's blown her chance...

 

However when I came back from travelling I found out she's seeing somebody completely different. When I found out, it bothered me a little bit, but Im annoyed with myself that it's bothering me. Is this natural?? Now I'm wondering if I made the right decision by rejecting her now that I feel like this. I feel like im in a bit of a weird place at the moment, as if Im stuck. As much as I liked her I dont want to be with her because she slept with my friend, yet I dont like it when she's seeing somebody else (selfish I know). What do you guys think?? My emotions are confusing me right now. My head says I did the right thing because the fact she slept with my friend shows she had no regard for my feelings, but my feelings and emotions say perhaps I miss her now

 

I don't know lol. Im confused. Im just looking for any advice from people with a completely objective viewpoint, that arn't confused with emotions. Do you think I did the right thing. How should I move on from here.

 

Thanks for reading

[WhenWillILove]

Well....honestly, I wouldn't want to put my genitalia where my best friend's genitalia was. But...that's just me.

[Longview01]

You my friend just dodged the bullet