Just a coincident?

[Little lady]

So my girlfriend and I had a pretty nice relationship. We laughed constantly would go out and do things constantly. Basically enjoying each others company to the max. We would fight every now and then and eventually a week ago said we were too different and that I deserved better and that things were her fault and that she was sorry.

 

Before this all happened I kind of thought she liked a co-worker she worked with and when she sent her a text a few weeks ago I saw that their thread of conversations had been deleted. Her excuse for deleting this was because she knew it made me feel uncomfortable and didn't want to see her name at the top of her inbox.

 

RED FLAG

 

So don't think anything about it since that girl co-worker "Blarah" was in a long term relationship

 

So girlfriend breaks up with me a week ago. Moves all of her stuff out in three days

 

I am out with friends and I run into" BLARAH'S" ex girlfriend "morrie"

 

"morrie" tells oh hey what's going on? Blarah broke up with me? She broke up with me three weeks ago and moved all of her stuff out

 

My ex and blarah are doing their masters program in the same area of study which is why she thinks we're so different...I've never heard her say anything like this to me! They work in different buildings and this girl would visit her often.

 

I wonder of "blarah" was the one in her ear, telling her these things.

 

 

 

Is this just a coincidence? I mean I guess it's not my problem anymore at least if she did leave me for someone else she had the decency to leave me first.

I know I shouldn't worry but I still think about it

 

Thoughts??

 

 

if they do end up together they probably deserve each other since blarah would cheat on morrie constantly. bleh.

[endy]

It's probably not coincidence. I wouldn't worry about it either way. It sucks yeah, but it's common and it's unhealthy to jump from relationship to relationship. You're better than that. Don't do the same.

[velvette]

sounds like she jumped ship for "blarah". they deserve each other, but you deserve better.

[Tanzi]

Well it certainly sounds suspicious but there is still a possibility that it could be a coincidence.

 

my ex-husband got on very well with a female employee of his who was also married. I had met both her and her husband and got on well with them myself. I was never threatened by their friendship. Anyway to cut a long story short my ex-husband left me and in the same week she left her husband. Tongues wagged amongst his employees (I heard through the grapevine) and even I thought it extremely suspicious. However they weren't having an affair with each other, though I'm not sure whether that really matters now as it turned out they were both having affairs anyway ... just not with each other. The timing may have been purely a coincidence but the outcome still wasn't positive.

 

All that said, this is a different situation and I don't want to sway you away from the possibilities of what could be going on here.

[indigoblue]

It could be probably that they've been developing a thing (doesn't necessarily have to be physical) for a while now. It's best to not think about it too much and if she did you wrong well, it will come back to her 10 fold.

[Little lady]

Should I send her a text that says, "Oh blarah is single now, maybe you guys can start dating!"

 

 

I feel like doing that, but I'm better than that....DAMN!

[Tanzi]

I wouldnt. You will regret it in a heartbeat. Yes you're better than that.

[symbiot]

You can't climb a mountain when you're wallowing in the mud.

[Little lady]

thanks....I'm not going to despite me wanting to so bad...

 

My heart is beating so fast and hard constantly...this is unhealthy.

 

 

[In The Cold]

don't do it! you can't use your heart if its broken - gotta stick to using your head.

[Little lady]

So I have recently discovered that these two are going 'out' tonight to one of our mutual friends shows. I can't help feeling that she left me for her. She swears that she didn't and that they are just friends.

 

To each their own it's not my problem anymore it's just very curious.

[NCMaster]

Its tough to be at peace if you do not have the answers. Especially if your relationship was long term. I found my answers eventually, but I still got the "we are just friends" even though they hooked up. It was close to impossible to go full NC till I had my answers.

 

Go no contact, do some fun things for yourself, let go a little and start dating eventually. If you guys had something good, she might (dont hold onto that) regret it if her new thing goes sour. Do NOT take her back in an instance. You will lose her faster the 2nd time around IF that chance comes around.

 

The bottomline is there is a reason she jumped ship. She is either curious/selfish/immature/incompatible with you/lost her spark or any combination of these factors(probly only touched on the possible reasons). But the bottomline is she left you. Be it for the right or wrong reasons, time will tell. The fact that she left you tells you she does not value your relationship enough.

 

Sorry to sound negative, but you have a great opportunity to work on yourself, do some introspection and hopefully attract the right kind of person next time around (be it her in time or someone else).

 

Whatever you do, do not pay attention to "get your ex back" threads. They often skip the main part, which is to get yourself back. One of the great things of getting yourself back is that you will have a chance at attracting new prospects. Right now your ex is your ex, in the future she will be just another prospect (which you probably will not want to explore)

 

Good luck and stay strong and remember to cut off all communication. It helps with the healing, getting yourself back and eventually finding new love.

 

Cheers

[Little lady]

This is exactly what I needed to read, thank you so much.