Callalily Posted October 19, 2011 Author Share Posted October 19, 2011 we saw each other again....ha even called at one o'clock in the morning to talk....he keeps saying that he wants me...but I feel that it's all just sexual, he doesn't wanna be with me completelly...or at least that's the vibe I got Link to comment
ClarenceRutherford Posted October 19, 2011 Share Posted October 19, 2011 we saw each other again....ha even called at one o'clock in the morning to talk.... he keeps saying that he wants me...but I feel that it's all just sexual, he doesn't wanna be with me completelly...or at least that's the vibe I got Your hunches may be correct. You're right to focus on the relationship over just sex, which he may be more interested in, sad to say. If you're open to seeing him, go out and date like other couples, like I recommended. Stay away from the sex (for now). Do things together and get to know each other better. Make that the focus. Not a prude, but the reason I recommend putting sex on the back burner is bec. many guys may appear to be truly interested in a relationship early on but in reality, only want sex and soon depart, as you've learned. This guy didn't drop you so fast, so there may be a light there, but guard yourself and let the relationship build. Did you receive my PM? Link to comment
Callalily Posted October 19, 2011 Author Share Posted October 19, 2011 one of my friends was telling me today about a guy that keeps making her booty calls...I get the feeling I'm in the same situation Link to comment
ClarenceRutherford Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 one of my friends was telling me today about a guy that keeps making her booty calls...I get the feeling I'm in the same situation If that's the case, Callalily, don't see this guy anymore. You're the best judge of if a guy is relationship material. If something doesn't seem right, don't go out with him. To verify things, you may want to ask him his intentions and where he sees this relationship going. If he's reluctant or just talks about "hanging out" or "being together" (i.e. sexually) but not seriously dating, taking you places, getting to know you better, etc., then your suspicions may be correct. Link to comment
Callalily Posted October 20, 2011 Author Share Posted October 20, 2011 I'm curious about his answer...but no matter his reply, I feel like it's not a good relationship for me, it's like he's pulling me down or something...we're so different... Link to comment
shl025 Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 Heya! I lost my virginity at 19, to an Irish guy who was visiting my city for the summer. He and I hung out a lot and gotten closer since he was staying with my friends for several months. My first time, it didn't hurt or bleed which isn't common for most girls but for which I am glad. He knew it was my first, he wasn't the most caring person and he left after a month. I was sad that he left. The next guy I had sex with was my first boyfriend who dumped me when we were in a long distance relationship because he started liking our mutual friend. He and I had been friends for 3 years before our relationship so I was BUTThurt; my heart, trust and friendship, basically our whole relationship was broken because of the break up. In hindsight I am glad my ex wasn't my first because I would feel so much worse. I understand that you feel bad; everybody dreams of the magical first time with somebody so special, but that's not reality. Everybody makes mistakes, you are not alone in this one, and things will get better. Do not beat yourself up for this. It's good that he seems to be caring, but don't do what you don't want to do again. Hope this made you feel better, you are not alone and you are not a bad person. Link to comment
ILYx3 Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 omg. u didnt get pregnant did u? ? i hope u didnt.. >.> thats why never get drunk... and make sure if u are drunk consume a little.. drunk can put u in a lot of risks and guys take this as an adcatnage Link to comment
Callalily Posted October 20, 2011 Author Share Posted October 20, 2011 shl025 I'm sorry things weren't great for you too...and that you suffered...thank you for your kind words.. Link to comment
Callalily Posted October 20, 2011 Author Share Posted October 20, 2011 ILYx3 no, I didn't get pregnant... Link to comment
ClarenceRutherford Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 omg. u didnt get pregnant did u? ? i hope u didnt.. >.> thats why never get drunk... and make sure if u are drunk consume a little.. drunk can put u in a lot of risks and guys take this as an adcatnage Methinks she knows that now. Learned a lesson about drinking and getting too sexual too soon with a guy. Regarding that casual sex incident I linked to earlier in this thread: I want to confess to something I haven't said publicly on this board: That woman I had sex with ... she was smoking a joint. I never did drugs nor drink to excess, but this "Good Guy" thought she might be vulnerable and pressed her for sex.... See the motives guys can have? Methinks Callalily's guy had less than noble motives. No, am not proud of my actions there and never did anything like that again... It was so unlike me, as I had only had sex 1 other time 19-30.... Link to comment
Callalily Posted October 20, 2011 Author Share Posted October 20, 2011 we went out several times but it wasn't a relationship...he ws interested in me for a long time...we've known each other for over a year and I sort of knew from the beginnig that he liked me...maybe I was just an ambition...for him Link to comment
Lonewing Posted October 20, 2011 Share Posted October 20, 2011 He may be wishywashy. Eitherway, no worries. Move on or stay put. You'll be fine either way. Link to comment
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