ohboo Posted October 9, 2011 Share Posted October 9, 2011 So, I'm 31 years old, and all my friends are married or living with their significant others. I live downtown in a major city, and they all live north, in the suburbs, starting their families. I got this great job, that I've wanted for years, about a year ago, and I love it. I travel a lot for work, and the hours are all over the place, so it keeps me quite busy. If I do end up with spare time though, I have to drive nearly an hour north if I want to see my friends. Which means I never get to drink, because I'm driving, and they always want to hang at one of their houses, or a local pub in the burbs, with their significant others all in a group. So, I'm always like the 5th, 7th, 9th wheel kinda thing... It sucks. I hate that I feel this way, because they are my friends and I love them. I should want to hang with them, but instead, I'd rather stay home alone because I'm starting to feel annoyed. I stay home nearly every friday and saturday night. Let me tell you, I rent a lot of movies lol! At first, when I got this job, it was good, I enjoyed the alone time as the job was so busy. But now, nearly a year later, and I'm wondering, what's the point in life if all I'm doing is working eating and sleeping and working again... Seems pointless really. I love my job, or at least I did. Now though, I'm so lonely and bored, that my motivation at work has gone down, a lot! I used to be one of the top people on my team, and I wanted to do so well, I tried so hard all the time, like an over acheiver! I wanted to impress my boss, which I did. But lately, I'm tired, all the time. And I don't even go out or do anything, so I don't understand it. I stayed in bed the entire day today, not sleeping, just watching tv and playing around on the internet. Basically, I lay around doing nothing all the time if I'm not working. And, I work from home, which makes this all even worse, because it's hard enough to get motivated to work normal hours when you work home, let alone when you are feeling lonely and unmotivated and perhaps a bit depressed. I want to see my friends, but I have nothing in common with them anymore. They talk about their weddings, their honeymoons, their house purchases of bbq's and drapes and silly things like that, house renovations and babies... I'm still renting! And in a crappy part of town none the less. I feel like I'm never going to have what any of them have. I make ok money, but it's not great. And I'm starting to think I'm going to be alone forever. I don't have anyone to go to a bar with me so I can meet a guy or stuff like that. I can't commit to being on any sports teams because I travel so much for work, and I can't afford a gym membership. Everyone always says to join a team or some sort of activity like a hobby to get out there, but I can't with my schedule. I'm at a loss. Lately, I think I'd like to just buy sleeping pills to use everynight so I can just sleep as soon as I'm done working, so that I won't have to stay up all night feeling so bad about myself, and my life. I'm starting to think I'll be alone forever. I broke up with my ex last summer, just a little over a year ago, and at first when I got this job, I didn't care that I was single. Loved the job, and was totally motivated in it. Loved spending time alone when I was done working... but now, I'm starting to feel so lonely that it's making me think I should try to find a bf, but I have no idea how to even do that. I'm at a loss as to how to fix these feelings, and they are getting worse. I know there are others that feel this way... Are there any that have felt this way and come out of it? If so, how? And please don't say by getting a significant other, because really I don't even have anything on the horizon as far as that is concerned, and if I keep hanging out with married people, I'll never meet someone! lol. Link to comment
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