tracielee38 Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 Hey guys. I need some serious advice? please.. I have been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year now. we have lived together for 7 months. He is very private.locks his phone and computer up. He is not an affectionate person at all,our sex life well there is not much of one. He does not talk to me very much,we don't go out.I give him 100% I buy him his food cook his dinners, do his laundry etc.. I get nothing in return,not that I want it but for him to show he appreciates me would be nice. He makes more money then I do. We don't share money (his idea)I guess you can say he is very boring.I pay 650 a month for rent he bought the house for us to live together. I think he is chatting online to other females, which I do not approve of(he says no).I do not talk to guys out of respect for him.we don't talk during the day a text to say hes thinking of me.. when we do talk all he says is yeah, ok, small stuff. He has a job to where he sits at a desk allday and waits for customer (which is seldom). He just seems to have a attitude with me.He's distant and cold. I have never had a relationship like this.I have always been in abusive ones.He is totally different.there is no abuse maybe emotional which hurts.Im insecure with him aand I never have been befire,he tells me its all in my head when I think of things and ask him.. I think he maybe bi-polar. He never takes the blame for anything it is always someone elses fault. if we argue he ignores me,until I won't shut up then he answers me..I'm lonely and cannot afford to make it on my own. I don't feel he loves me. although he tells me,but he could be lying. Is it my mind playing tricks on me or could he be talking to females or other things? I was diagnosed with PTSD. I know depression can make your mind do crazy things.. On his days off he doesn't go anywhere(that I know of ,he says he don't) just sits on the computer and I m working so I don't know what he is doing.Am I wasting my time with him, I love him so much but he is not fulfilling my wants and needs. I have tried to talk to him and he says im complaining and * * * * * ing. I know he is not cheating on me or am I naive? He will never change I feel. I will not cheat on him.. it seems now he is trying to blame everything on my son. he corrects me when I say something wrong,like im a 3 year old. i just don't know what to any advice would be great..Thanks Link to comment
Jetta Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 My guess is he is into porn. It also doesn't sound like much of a relationship, I'd find a new place and move on. Link to comment
offplanet Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 Reading through that, there is not one reason why you should be with this man. Well, not one good reason. But the bad reasons why you're with him are, like you say, that the others you've been with have been abusive, and I guess you just 'need to be with someone', no matter how poorly he treats you, rather than be on your own. Because you haven't said one positive thing about him or this relationship except that he doesn't physically abuse you. You seem to be willing to put up with a lot, ie. he' s not affectionate, there's little sex, he talks to you like you're a 3 yr old, he talks to other females online (probably), he's distant and cold, he blames your son for everything....and you put up with this because, it seems, you would be lonely and not able to make it on your own. If that's your attitude, I guess you won't be doing anything about getting out of the situation. Of course you should, but if you're willing to put up with all that, and don't wish to stand on your own feet, you will probably stay. So what's the question?? Link to comment
catfeeder Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 What does this guy bring to the table that's so fabulous? Is he worth living in limbo? Link to comment
Jd1983 Posted October 5, 2011 Share Posted October 5, 2011 After reading your thread, I was even starting to feel sorry for you. Honestly, there was not one positive thing that you mentioned about your relationship. Are you even remotely happy? Why bother to stay in a relationship, when it doesn't even seem as though you have a friendship? He is more like a roommate than anything else. I'm sorry to say, but if he hasn't changed in over a year, I highly doubt things will get any better. It's best to cut your losses now, and keep it moving than stay in an unfulfilling relationship. Link to comment
tracielee38 Posted October 5, 2011 Author Share Posted October 5, 2011 @JDI983 Thanks..I know I don't have any positives on him.. I don't even think I'am happy. You are not the only one who said he is more like a roommate. Im just so scared to leave he is my stability and all I have. thanks for you reply.. Link to comment
tracielee38 Posted October 5, 2011 Author Share Posted October 5, 2011 @catfeeder Thanks. He brings stability and that is it.. Im trying to find a higher paying job so I can possibly be on my own.. Link to comment
tracielee38 Posted October 5, 2011 Author Share Posted October 5, 2011 @offplanet.. thanks I'am trying to find a higher paying job so I can leave.. I don't like living this way.it is not healthy. and I'am so depressed. I guess there was no question.. Your answer helped alot..thanks Link to comment
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