gluestick Posted October 4, 2011 Share Posted October 4, 2011 Every family has its share of problems and drama. The environment in which you're raised has a huge effect on how you view and handle relationships. I come from a family where my parents have been married for 30 years. While they've had their share of fights, they are now happy and content with everything we have today. My ex, on the other hand, comes from a family that are very loving and close, but dysfunctional. His mother suffered from years of severe depression. His dad has been working overseas for approx. the last 10 years to get away from the wife and has also been having affairs, though unbeknownst to my ex and his younger sister. My family and myself have always suspected this and confirmed it one night when I accidentally overheard my ex's mom on the phone. Anyway, long story short, a lot of people say that a marriage is never between two people. When you marry someone, you marry their family and their problems too. My parents always tell me to pick guys with normal families because it's just messier if they have a lot of family drama and burdens. While I agree with this, I can't help who I fall in love with, especially when you only witness their family drama after dating for a while. Throughout the last 4 years of dating my ex, I've come to accept and love his family, but I can see where my parents are coming from. My belief in marriage is that it's forever because I have my parents as example. My ex didn't believe in marriage when we first started dating and we would constantly argue as a result of that. His dad's way of resolving conflict is by running away, so to a certain degree that sets an example for my ex. He also witnessed years of his mom's depression, so he hates any kind of drama and believes a relationship should be perfect. For those of you who've dated people with dysfunctional family situations, would you agree with what my parents believe? That a relationship or marriage is between two families. How someone is raised and the family he/she is raised in can greatly influence that person's relationships. It's better to be with someone who come from a similar family because your fundamental beliefs are the same, although that's not to say that two people from two entirely different families can't make it work b/c so many couples do. Please feel free give your opinions and thoughts or experiences. Thanks! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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