Eh, I just don't like you anymore, you gained a few... so it never happened...

[Princess123]

link removed

 

Putting love on a contract and time frame? Doomed to fail? I think marriage certificates in general are absurd...

 

I think commitment ceremonies would be better because it doesn't put a contract between two people. Personally I think that is silly to have a contract but this is even worse. If someone doesn't think it last then why get married in the first place?

 

For them to do that I'm thinking... well people should take it seriously if they want to marry someone, now if this passes, will no one ever take it seriously? Just go down there... go head and marry anyone knowing after a couple years they can walk away like it didn't happen?

 

Would anyone actually want to do this?

[annie24]

I don't know - i think it's kind of a good idea. Maybe smarter than getting traditionally married when 50% of marriages fail.

[OptomisticGirl]

I think with this, divorce rates will sky rocket and just give the nay sayers to marriage who live by statistics, more 'data' to throw in people's faces. 'The divorce rate rose 30%! Don't get married!"

 

i wonder why it rose.....

[Princess123]

I know this isn't in the U.S. and over here it is still a struggle with gay couples. But that is being religiously bias because the whole man and woman thing is religious. So if we can cut out prayers (religion thing) from school, why not religion from marriage?

 

Anyways. Just think that the divorce rate will go up but not be marked down so to speak. That doesn't help anyone. I would think it's better for people to really make sure and know this is the one person, then to go through test runs with 2 year minimums.

[OptomisticGirl]

I know this isn't in the U.S. and over here it is still a struggle with gay couples. But that is being religiously bias because the whole man and woman thing is religious. So if we can cut out prayers (religion thing) from school, why not religion from marriage?

 

Anyways. Just think that the divorce rate will go up but not be marked down so to speak. That doesn't help anyone. I would think it's better for people to really make sure and know this is the one person, then to go through test runs with 2 year minimums.

 

You don't have to be religious, of any kind, to enter into marriage.

 

I agree. The statistics done nowadays don't include WHY marriage failed. All it is is saying this % of marriages failed, this % lasted.. to me, it makes a whole lot of difference if a marriage failed because someone cheated vs. someone being abused.

[truegrit]

My husband has always said he thinks marriages should be like drivers licenses that they have to be renewed every few years, that way if you don't want to be married anymore you just let it expire and go your own way. Sounds like a man's thinking, LOL! However, knowing it isn't really right but it isn't THAT bad of an idea.

[Princess123]

Oh I know that. But the principle of man can't marry another man is pretty much religious and that is why they don't "allow" it freely everywhere. My opinion. You can get married being any religion or no religion.

 

I feel this makes it a lot worse because you don't really have to admit you been married before.

 

Your husband seems to not have much faith in being married if he thinks that way.

[20sgal88]

It is kinda smart in an insensitive way. If you still love each other, just get your marriage license renewed. Kinda like a driver's license. It certainly takes out the mystical, lovey-dovey aspect, but maybe this is progress to better accommodate human nature.

[Fudgie]

I actually think it's a great idea. Too many people get married without really knowing what they are getting into. I think a "temporary" marriage license, fully upgradable within 2 years, is a great idea. It allows you to "test the waters" BEFORE you go off and get married to the wrong person so therefore, you screw up your last name, screw up your finances, etc.

 

I don't know, I'm weird though. i don't see marriage as this fuzzy, lovey-dovey thing.

[truegrit]

Actually, I think my husband was basically kidding when he said it. He has been married/divorced twice before and his second marriage only lasted 1.5 years. He was single for 16 years before we got married so he had plenty of time to think about it.

I think especially for the real young getting married it might not be a bad idea. It doesn't say that if you renew the license is that forever then or ?

I've been around the block so to speak with marriage and being married to 3 different men about 40 years of my life so I may have a different outlook on it than some

[petite]

Terrible idea. Marriages end for various reasons and statistics don't show those reasons. Having a contract which expires in x years means that people would be jumping from one partner to another and marrying just because they think it's fun. Of course such marriages happen now - albeit infrequently, but at least marriage is still somewhat respected, this would just diminish that respect and people would not be inclined to work harder and make their marriages work. It's an easy way out, but not one that would reflect positively on society. I would never get married just to be married and then have that 'contract' end. People might as well not marry if they need a contract which states the marriage is to end on a particular date.

[Seraphim]

Sounds like a swap and trade every few years, not my cup of tea.

[Fudgie]

I'm of the belief that if you actually value monogamy and marry a guy who does the same, then it isn't going to matter where the marriage license lasts for forever, 2 years, or even not have one at all! Your partner will still be with you. That's how I see it.

 

The only people who would really use the system are those who maybe shouldn't be getting married in the first place. This would allow them to break away from it easier. And I see nothing wrong with that. Less money spent on legal fees.

 

What "other people" do with their marriages (divorcing, hopping from one to the next) really has no effect on you and doesn't devalue your own marriage.

[Seraphim]

Terrible idea. Marriages end for various reasons and statistics don't show those reasons. Having a contract which expires in x years means that people would be jumping from one partner to another and marrying just because they think it's fun. Of course such marriages happen now - albeit infrequently, but at least marriage is still somewhat respected, this would just diminish that respect and people would not be inclined to work harder and make their marriages work. It's an easy way out, but not one that would reflect positively on society. I would never get married just to be married and then have that 'contract' end. People might as well not marry if they need a contract which states the marriage is to end on a particular date.

 

I agree completely. A lot of things have come about to erode society and give people an easy out.

[Fudgie]

Terrible idea. Marriages end for various reasons and statistics don't show those reasons. Having a contract which expires in x years means that people would be jumping from one partner to another and marrying just because they think it's fun. Of course such marriages happen now - albeit infrequently, but at least marriage is still somewhat respected, this would just diminish that respect and people would not be inclined to work harder and make their marriages work. It's an easy way out, but not one that would reflect positively on society. I would never get married just to be married and then have that 'contract' end. People might as well not marry if they need a contract which states the marriage is to end on a particular date.

 

Agreed but how does this affect you: someone who obviously values marriage in that you believe it lasts for a lifetime.

 

Again, I'm unclear on why married people get all up in arms over other married people not treating marriage the same. If your marriage is strong, why does it matter what anyone else does? Your rights as a married couple are still intact.

[Princess123]

It really doesn't matter what anyone thinks about a persons personal life... I see this as what if there are some people who are "addicted" to being married? They swap out a partner every couple years? So they aren't technically divorced and don't have to put that down anywhere... so their future one has no idea that they could of done this rodeo a few times before. One if one partner wants to go years (lifetime) while the other only has a secret plan of 2 years?

[annie24]

I agree completely. A lot of things have come about to erode society and give people an easy out.

 

There already is an easy out. divorce. very easy these days, and not really a mark of shame.

 

In fact... I've heard some people say, "Well, at least I'm 35 and divorced, and not 35 and single. Someone wanted me. It's not like I'm weird and no one wanted to marry me." And I'm thinking, "ok, so you are proud of having a failed marriage, rather than being single and picky???"

[Seraphim]

Well, I do not look at divorce as a "badge of shame" or anything like that or even being single at 35 as a stigma either.

 

I am not stopping anyone from doing what they want. They can have any sort of relationship they please, I don't have to agree it is great for society in general though. People do not even have to agree with me. It does not bother me. It is why we are all different with different opinions and experiences and values. I prefer marriage for sure, but if someone does not, ok, don't ,it is no big issue to me. The point where I start to have an issue is when people state that marriage," should be abolished" and other sweeping statements, because just as they want to be free to do as they please that is not allowing others the same.

 

Nowhere does it state in life that people have to agree.

[annie24]

oh no, i don't think traditional marriage should be abolished either. but i think for a lot of hollywood stars, who have marriages that rarely last for over 2 years, it's probably a better idea.

[SuperBearGo]

At first I thought this was a great ideal but after thinking about it a bit more I don't think it is. Yeah a lot of young couples rush into marriage, but after going through one hell of a divorce it's what makes them more couscous about rushing into the next marriage. But with something like this marriage would be a lot like dating. Teens could basically get married when their in that honeymoon phase to every boyfriend they date with out much consequence. Getting proposed to would mean squat. Instead of I want to spend the rest of my life with you I'm that committed, It would say eh we'll give it two years see how things go.

[Seraphim]

At first I thought this was a great ideal but after thinking about it a bit more I don't think it is. Yeah a lot of young couples rush into marriage, but after going through one hell of a divorce it's what makes them more couscous about rushing into the next marriage. But with something like this marriage would be a lot like dating. Teens could basically get married when their in that honeymoon phase to every boyfriend they date with out much consequence. Getting proposed to would mean squat. Instead of I want to spend the rest of my life with you I'm that committed, It would say eh will give it two years see how things go.

 

Yeah, I do not see it ending well. If someone said to me, " I will give it 2 years and we will see how we are, but I am committed to this relationship." I would probably laugh in their face and walk away. Nah, it is not for me.

[petite]

Agreed but how does this affect you: someone who obviously values marriage in that you believe it lasts for a lifetime.

 

Again, I'm unclear on why married people get all up in arms over other married people not treating marriage the same. If your marriage is strong, why does it matter what anyone else does? Your rights as a married couple are still intact.

 

I have never said that a marriage lasts a lifetime. That would be a ridiculous statement because we never know what might happen and even the happiest of marriages can and do end for a variety of reasons. Contracting the length of a marriage affects society and the way marriage is viewed, indirectly it will affect many relationships and people will no longer take marriage as seriously.

 

If people want to contract the length of their marriage then there isn't any reason to get married, just stay in a relationship and leave two years later.

[Blue Spiral]

Marriage has always been a contract, I'm glad that some people are being more open about it.

 

"easy outs" are necessary to protect people from themselves. It's the same reason we have seat belts, the morning-after pill, no-fault divorce...you want to encourage responsibility, but there will always be situations where people make mistakes. It's better to acknowledge that and try to deal with it than to just ignore it and say "Everybody be perfect, and everything will be okay!"

 

Also, I couldn't care less about statistics. I care that over fifty percent of real live marriages are failing. When something that unnecessary is also risky, well...

[Fudgie]

If people want to contract the length of their marriage then there isn't any reason to get married, just stay in a relationship and leave two years later.

 

Again, that may not be YOUR idea of marriage, but why should other people have to follow your idea of it? (BTW, I'm with you, I don't see much of a point if it's contracted but that's just my personal viewpoint) but I support the idea because I believe that it would be easier in terms of legal stuff if people get divorced and also I think marriage means different things to different people. Why should we say "no! YOU cannot have contracted marriages because that's not what I believe!"

 

If people "no longer take marriage seriously" (any less than they do know), please, tell me, how does this affect your marriage? Is it somehow worth less? Does your relationship suffer because of what these external people are doing?

[petite]

Again, that may not be YOUR idea of marriage, but why should other people have to follow your idea of it? (BTW, I'm with you, I don't see much of a point if it's contracted but that's just my personal viewpoint) but I support the idea because I believe that it would be easier in terms of legal stuff if people get divorced and also I think marriage means different things to different people. Why should we say "no! YOU cannot have contracted marriages because that's not what I believe!"

 

If people "no longer take marriage seriously" (any less than they do know), please, tell me, how does this affect your marriage? Is it somehow worth less? Does your relationship suffer because of what these external people are doing?

 

I never said people should follow my idea, I don't make the rues but I am a part of society and my opinion matters just as yours does and everyone elses'. I know how messy divorces can get, but people need to take responsibility for their own actions; be a little more careful who they marry, and when.

 

Why should we say yes? I wont say yes just for the sake of some person that can't make up their mind about a partner they want to attempt and share their life with. I see nothing positive in having a marriage license which expires in 2 years - that's ridiculous. Don't get married if you don't want an marriage which you will work at if there are issues within the marriage and divorce as a last resort. It's a sacred unity of two people, not a cell phone contract.

 

How does it affect my marriage? Well once I am married indirectly it will affect me and the way marriage is viewed. What was once a sacred unity for people that wanted to start a new journey and a life together will now be something that people will do for the heck of it, just because they can.