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Anybody have problems spending time alone?


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I've had this problem for a while. It seems that I have a really hard time trying to enjoy any time alone. I feel like I always have to be around people, otherwise I feel lonely sitting at home by myself. I think part of what has sparked this is somewhat of a desperation to find a girlfriend. I want to constantly be around people so I can increase my exposure around other women, but I feel that the less it happens the more I have to constantly be around people to not miss out on anything.


Anyone ever feel this way?

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Yes! I have been this way my entire life. My mother and sister are hermits and homebodies, and would prefer snuggling up on their respective sofas alone than to going out with others.

They never understood me. They thought I was a weirdo and treated me accordingly.

I prefer to live with roommates, not because I need help with bills, but because I like sharing the house.

I prefer to do my favourite activities in pairs, as opposed to alone.

If I find I've been isolated for a day or more, I become depressed and cry.

I thrive while I'm in a relationship, and tend to feel down when I'm single (but not always, as long as I have enough friends to spend time with)

It's just your personality type. Try to work with it, rather than against it.

I know I probably will never learn to enjoy being a homebody (even though growing up I thought I'd have to learn to like it)

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I hear you. Right now I'm actually studying abroad and they gave us our own rooms. It's good and bad. On the plus side I have a good view of the courtyard so when I see people outside I can go out and talk to them. Thanks for the help, sometimes it just feel tough having to sit around with nothing to do.

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I know that we all can feel this way at times, but I would challenge you to really dig deeper and to determine where the feelings of loneliness are coming from. There is a balance needed in our lives where we have time with others and also time with ourselves. If you are not comfortable spending time with yourself there is a deeper issue-normally one that we just have a void where we want someone else to fill it instead of learning to fill it ourselves.

Previously have I have hated to be by myself. My friends call me a "social butterfly." I am very social, but I also appreciate the time with myself. When I used to get depressed when by myself, it was horrible. Now I have learned that I felt that way because I didn't like myself as much as I should have. If we are constantly looking for others to complete us, then we are not doing ourselves justice. We should love being alone because this is time for us. It is a chance to grow and be content.

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