How to build a successful relationship.

[symbiot]

Ok so here is some of my story some of it is spread throughout my earlier post if you want to know more on how I treated this girl.

Basically I did everything she and every other woman I known has told me they wanted to be treated. I didn't even know I could be that good to someone and I loved it. So my question is this: If I only know one way to treat a woman how do I build a REAL, GREAT, SUCCESSFUL relationship and not end up back here in a few years singing the blues on the healing after a break up board?

[Captain Obvious]

People dont always know what they want. Communication is the most important part to a relationship, talking openly about differences and problems and solving them is what its all about. Stick to who you are, make some compromises yes, but never change who you are for someone else.

[symbiot]

I feel as though I've always been a great communicator. I actually look forward to discussing my issues. And on compromise, well I probably compromised WAY too much.

[Mesemene]

Always maintain a degree of independence. By that, I mean treasure your differences as well as your "things in common."

[Gimpyrks]

The way to a healthy relationship is making sure that your healthy. You can't build a house with rotten wood.

[symbiot]

I like it. You sound like me. I say s***like that all the time.

[mhowe]

Staying with the house analogy:

 

Foundation needs to be solid. Ingredients: Friendship, trust, communication

 

Framing comes next: mutual values, integrity, desire, intention

 

The rest is just cosmetic!!!!

[Realitynut]

My bf, who then cheated on me, was always quoting the 4 cornerstones of a good relationship. But we never could agree what the four cornerstones where!!! lol I always said, Respect, trust, communication, and commitment. I think he kept changing commitment to something else, like sexual compatibility, or something like that...can't remember...it's been too long. Funny thing is, out of those 4, I thought trust was the one thing I had down pat. Our communication got rocky, cuz I confronted, and he withdrew. I was TOTALLY commited. I always felt where I failed was not respecting him enough. like talking disrespectul to him. But trust...I trusted him completely, and then find out he was cheating, and then lying over and over about it....boy, what an eye opener...

[Snuggly]

I feel as though I've always been a great communicator. I actually look forward to discussing my issues. And on compromise, well I probably compromised WAY too much.

 

Be careful here. Communication is mostly about really listening. Discussing HER issues too. Asking her about her hopes and dreams. Past relationships seemed to always involve men always talking about themselves and not as interested in me. Everyone loves someone who is interested in listening and talking about them.

 

My 3 ingredients to a sucessful relationship are:

1. Talk to me and listen to me. Remember what I said.

2. Take me out nice places sometimes, where I get dressed up and feel spoilt. Tell me I look beautiful.

3. Show lots of affection, hold my hand, snuggle

 

My current partner does this, and I love him with my whole heart and soul and feel completely satisfied.

[symbiot]

Yep. Did all that.