Do they really ever forget you?

[horse2000]

I am really sruggling to comprehend the fact that, despite a four year relationship, my ex has moved on (now onto girlfriend no. 2 since our breakup 1 year ago) and is happy with the NC that I initiated 2 months ago. He has deleted my phone number from his phone which would suggest that he has deleted me from all aspects of his life.

 

I simply don't understand that you give your whole life to someone else for 4 years, you help and support them in almost every aspect of their life (health, finance, lifestyle) and they are happy to move on and, assumably, forget. Can anyone enlighten me????

[resilient7]

People just move on that way,it doesn't mean they completely forget but they aren't thinking of you the way you probably would like them to.but yes,they do remember you,wether they want to reconcile is another matter.

[Acrylamide]

It's pretty unfair. We're over here crying our eyes out (well I am), while they're doing whatever they want. It really sucks.

 

The world is cruel.

 

For now I say Cheers in hopes for a better tomorrow.

[LaKings55]

Unless they suffer from memory loss, no they'll never "forget" you. Naturally, they may choose to never speak to you again, but such is life.

[LaKings55]

It's pretty unfair. We're over here crying our eyes out (well I am), while they're doing whatever they want. It really sucks.

 

The world is cruel.

 

For now I say Cheers in hopes for a better tomorrow.

 

Not everyone who ends a relationship is pleased by their decision. Many regret it. Others ended things based on circumstances outside their control. We have the power to choose how we respond to things. Why let another person have such control over your emotions? Move on, it's for the best

[DerekJason]

they wont forget, BUT, they dont give a rats ass about us, so carry on.

[DerekJason]

It's pretty unfair. We're over here crying our eyes out (well I am), while they're doing whatever they want. It really sucks.

 

The world is cruel.

 

For now I say Cheers in hopes for a better tomorrow.

 

i wish the best for you, speaking for myself i have reached a revelation. I DO NOT GIVE A F88K about her any longer, this will be one of my last posts, im done grieving. I AM DONEEEEEE.

[LDRohnos]

The "not giving a rats ass" is usually a defensive mechanism to avoid further hurt and pain. But yes, people generally never forget prior relationships (unless you're rifling through them like it's a race) as you learn a little from each one.

[Doofus]

I remember even the drunk one-night stands (well... mostly). What is true, and will be true for you, is that over time you stop thinking about your old relationships every single day. This is true regardless of whether you or they initiated the break, whether you or they were 'in love' whether you or they move on quickly to other relationships. A couple of recent stories in my life.

1. I received a few phone calls from a woman that I was with for less than a year back in the early nineties. She was the one who left me. She did because she was in love with somebody else.

 

2. I recently traveled half way around the world. An ex of mine from the late eighties lives there. While I didn't get in contact with her, I thought about doing so every day. I would have been happy to see her if we had bumped into each other. We broke up because she wanted to get married after living together for 2 years; I wanted to get married too. Just not to her.

 

I am certainly a weirdo in other ways, but not when it comes to this stuff. They are definitely thinking of you. Maybe fondly, maybe with desire in their hearts. Probably they sometimes wish things had been different and the two of you were still together (after all, they wanted to be together with some version of you at some time.) This is all true, even if, they will never ever take you back. Which sucks. So, feel bad, but don't feel bad over things that aren't true. You're not forgotten.

 

Unless they've suffered some kind of traumatic head injury...

[Nick Lansing]

Well said! I'm 43 and agree completely. Ran into someone a few months ago with whom I'd had a drunken one-night stand about 17 or 18 years ago. She remembered me almost right away and even remembered small details from that night (as did I).

 

No chance your ex has forgotten you.