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Feeling really down :(

lonelyheart2

By lonelyheart2
in Getting Back Together

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lonelyheart2 Collaborator

lonelyheart2

Posted
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Hi, I guess I just need to vent here a bit...I've been feeling so down for the past 3 weeks I have been going in to uni for the past two and everywhere I go I'm hoping and not hoping to bump in to my ex but it never happens I miss him so much and everything still reminds me of him despite our break up happening 3 months ago, i have very short moments where I feel ok but that's because I'm thinking that there is still a chance we could be together and other moments I still feel like crying and I have to go somewhere private so I can get myself back together again.

 

It's like when we first broke up I think it's because I have to keep going to all the places that make me think of him and knowing that he is in such close proximity to me is really unhelpful Does anyone have any more ideas to help with this? I know we are all going through the same thing on here but how does everyone else cope with this?

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Airbag Explorer

Airbag

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Posted

There's no specific way to cope with it. The most important thing to work on is your own confidence. Don't spend too much time alone. When you're alone, that's when it gets bad. You start to think about him/her, and maybe even break down. Try to have as many people around you as possible.

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indea08 Mentor

indea08

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I'm learning how to cope myself...I feel sick to my stomach all the time, I haven't sleep through the night in over a week, I have no desire to do anything, I feel fake everytime I smile. Reading other people's problems on here helps me. When my friends had boy troubles, I always told them to be the girl that every girl wants to be. The girl who won't let anything break her, who is independently beautiful and won't tolerate a man who isn't good enough for her. That's what I tell myself. I want to be that strong of a girl, so therefore, I'm choosing to be that strong. I'm done crying over him, I'm tired of being upset over him. I'm not gonna cry over someone who won't cry over me. Girl power baby.

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lonelyheart2 Collaborator

lonelyheart2

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Yeah I feel sick a lot too and haven't been sleeping it's so annoying!! I know what you mean I want to be that girl too and if he doesn't miss me then I want to be able to do that too I want to not miss him, I'm trying but I feel like I need constant counselling from other people to remind me of this (mainly my sister and you guys ) pretty sure everyone else thinks I'm fine which is crazy but I want to be! Will try to be 'that' girl as you say! I don't know why I have to make it so hard for myself, he's fine with this, I'm going to be fine with this.

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i got burned Newbie

i got burned

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I'm having the same problem. I spent all day getting together the motivation to go to the bookstore. I just wanted to distract myself for a while. When I finally got there, I walked into the center of the store and heard the music that was playing. To my dismay, it was a CD that we always listened to together. I nearly had a panic attack, as I fled the store and returned to my car. It's so pathetic that someone can make you feel this way.

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inquisitive Newbie

inquisitive

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Everyone is different - 3 weeks, 3 months, 3 years... depends on who you are. For me, it's been six months and I am still in agony and I can't see it fading any time soon. My ex works in the same department, is on the same floor as me and has an office opposite me. We can't avoid seeing each other, even when I needed to, and now we're trying to be friends. He's desperate to be 'best friends' and most of the time, I get the impression that he still feels something, but even if he does or doesn't, he doesn't want me anymore, and I am finding it impossible to move on.

 

I've been seeing a counsellor - my friends got very tired of listening to me - especially after six months of heartbreak, and she said that it doesn't matter how long you grieve, as long as you grieve properly so you can heal and move on.

Venting is a brilliant thing, too. I joined this forum tonight, because I saw a photo of my ex and I together (having had lunch together today), and I broke down all over again. Somethings just take time. I hope you're OK - the first few weeks of university are hard, even when you're not going through a break up - just try to think of all the people you're meeting who, whether you know it or not, will probably change your life.

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jolbell69 Rookie

jolbell69

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lonelyheart2 - it is also 3 months for me, and the pain is still awful. I have days where I can't stop thinking of him, and I remember how wonderful it was being with him. Then, I try to do something positive and get out, even if only to walk with my dog. I feel for you - it is a horrible time. Just take it an hour, a day at a time. It has to get better eventually. Hugs to you...xx

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lonelyheart2 Collaborator

lonelyheart2

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I did something naughty..............I messaged him....but I got a friendly response back pretty much immediately and communication is open...I know I'm setting myself up for hurt and I know that the relationship is doomed as he's moving to italy once the year is up but....well yeah..I know I'm probably my own worst enemy but I'm feeling good right now and tomorrow I'm going swimming and studying my new courses .....The fact that I had to tell you guys just shows how guilty I feel....I feel like I just stole my parents chocolates....

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