AloneAgain19 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 Alright so, I havent been on here in quite a while since my ridiculous breakup. Up to this day, I've been doing pretty great, my ex still texts me and confesses her undying love to me when shes drunk etc, but today I stumbled on something. I'm a psychology major and I was doing a little reading about codependency issues and I think my past relationship may have left me with some underlying problems of this kind. I'm a psych major and I evaluate myself regularly, and this is what I have come up with so far... I have noticed for a long time that I'm a fixer, I fix peoples problems for them and I take care of things and it has become my identity. Heres a few things I noticed that are codependent behavior: I was thinking about... -How riled up I used to get about my buddies girlfriend treating him like * * * * and watching him deviate from everything he stands for as a man and a person. -How afraid I am to approach people I don't know, and how I drink sometimes to alleviate that (at parties etc) -When my friend raises an issue he is having, with an ex, or with someone in general, I end up acting like a damn social worker and sitting there and being the most interested party in the problem. Thats great for my profession, but not for my self. -I have a pretty sub par self image I think. -I feel unfulfilled if I havent received some kind of attention from the opposite sex in a while -I do everything with one of my friends in particular, and I feel like I am replacing my relationship camaraderie with a friendship somehow. -I am either really over the top outgoing and funny, or I am reserved and dont talk too much, I have no happy medium. -I come from a broken family where I was the fixer for my mom after she was destroyed by her divorce and my dad's cheating and alcoholism. I might be tripping myself out here, but I kind of just stumbled onto this because I was reading a book in the coffee shop accross the street from my new apartment, and a beautiful girl was sitting accross from me, and I couldn't get up and talk to her because I thought I would be bothering her, and I couldn't think of anything to say, I froze, and she left. I realized my self esteem isn't what it should be and I have issues with approach, but a pull toward women that is almost agonizing because of my need for partnership. I have noticed this stuff because I have been thrown into an environment where I need to do everything over. I transferred schools, I am at a school with 6 times as many students as my old one, and I dont know anyone. I have met probably 5-6 people in the month I have been here. I hope I don't sound nuts, any advice here. I just broke this down into the tiniest pieces I could, I self actualize like nobodies business but its knowing what to do after that gets me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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