Should I be concerned if my boyfriend smokes marijuana?

[Voguester]

I only just found this out and I'm a person who hasn't had any exposure to illegal drugs, I don't necessarily have a problem with it because I know it's pretty common for people do use marijuana these days but I just know nothing about what it does and the effect it has etc.

I might be moving in with him soon and so if this something I should be concerned about?

[agent1607307371]

How much and how often does he smoke it? How much money does he spend on it?

 

As with alcohol, in moderation it's usually fine, but in excess, like anything, it can be a problem.

[FathomFear]

It's extremely common as you say. And the "danger" involved with it really depends on where you live. For example, where I live in Canada it's still illegal on the books but decriminalized in practice. A guy I know at my workplace got caught with some in his car, and he got the "Tsk tsk--don't let us catch you with this again" kind of response. But in other countries/states the consequences could be more dire.

 

It's always kind of baffled me why it's illegal in so many places in the world given that just about all scientific evidence shows that alcohol consumption is way worse for you. The laws will probably change as soon as governements find a way of making just as much money off it, I'm sure.

[zccr3279]

How much and how often does he smoke it? How much money does he spend on it?

 

As with alcohol, in moderation it's usually fine, but in excess, like anything, it can be a problem.

 

 

It's about priorities. If weed/pot/marijuana is his priority, it will consume the relationship. I know people who wake up with weed on their mind, and every decision they make revolves around it.

[Fudgie]

How old are you?

 

Pot is pretty common among young people. Where I am from, it's decriminalised in my state. But in other states, WATCH OUT.

As long as he doesn't do it too much (in moderation) and he's not increasing the amount over time, then it's okay.

 

If you're worried about him smoking it around you and you don't want to get into trouble, ask him politely to get baked in his car so your house doesn't smell (if you live together) then when he's high, he can come back inside.

[chitown9]

I might be moving in with him soon and so if this something I should be concerned about?

 

I think that you should be very concerned about the effects of marijuanna. Why don't you research the effects of marijuanna?...

[Fudgie]

I can personally contest to the fact that I don't see why we allow alcohol but disallow MJ.

 

Some people with mental problems and such really shouldn't smoke it, and some may experience some adverse effects, but otherwise, I don't see it any differently than just taking a drink. The difference is, you can't do it in public...probably shouldn't drink in public either because you can get arrested for being drunk. You know the whole shebang....don't use it too much, don't be dumb about it, don't tell a lot of people that you do it, and when you're high, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT DRIVE A CAR.

 

I hope your boyfriend is at least responsible with his pot usage.

[Atrium]

I think that you should be very concerned about the effects of marijuanna. Why don't you research the effects of marijuanna?...

What? Memory loss? A dry throat? A big appetite!?!?! Blood shot eyes!!!!!

 

Yeah don't get hooked on the Mary Jane kids...

 

 

.....Puhleeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzzeeeeeeee. Don't give advice if you don't know what you're talking about.

[abitbroken]

Are you moving long distance to be with him? I don't think this is about swaying you one way or the other whether it should be legal or not, but what you tolerate in your life and what you want in your personal space. Someone who lives in the next building was evicted and it took them weeks to clean all the pot stink out of his place. It was really sgross. People have different reactions, but eating like crazy, delayed reflexes and memory loss are symptoms. Pot caused impotence/low sperm count in a friend of mine. They were trying to have a baby and could not even through fertility treatments.

 

If you decide to move in, I honestly would move NEAR him first and date him, but if you do, have clear ground rules about it. Speak up about setting the rules about it not being smoked in the bedroom, or other agreed to places, etc. And also find out how much he smokes BEFORE you move. If he smokes one every month or so - that is different from him smoking them daily like cigarettes and making it a part of his lifestyle. Also, you need to know if he deals also so you can make an informed decision about moving in or not.

 

I know people sometimes don't think its a problem but people who smoke pot don't seem to just light up one, it seems that going over to so and so's house to smoke is what happens. A smoking buddy comes over. It just seems that way. At least with my neighbor, that old friend and others.

[Capricorn3]

.....Puhleeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzzeeeeeeee. Don't give advice if you don't know what you're talking about.

That was a little rude/uncalled for, don't you think? Her only advice was to do some research on the effects, which I think is a really good idea and good advice. She didn't claim to know anything, hence her advice to do research.

 

OP: I don't know too much about this either, so I would also say do some research and follow your gut instinct. Others here may have more experience and can offer some good advice.

[Atrium]

That was a little rude/uncalled for, don't you think? Her only advice was to do some research on the effects, which I think is a really good idea and good advice. She didn't claim to know anything, hence her advice to do research

Oh really?

 

I think that you should be very concerned about the effects of marijuanna.

 

Sounds to me like she thinks she knows about marijuana's "adverse" effects.

 

And I do know about this, unlike you and chitown, so I'm only saying that it's not a problem, barring the fact that it's against the law.

[Capricorn3]

I might be moving in with him soon and so if this something I should be concerned about?

Speaking for myself only, I would be very concerned about the fact that it is illegal and wouldn't want to be involved in that. Even if you don't use it, just being in the company of others who are using, can sometimes cause trouble.

[ninachamile]

I agree with the moderation of smoking pot. If you wake up and you have to have it, thats a bit much. If he is "stupid" with it, driving around the city getting high thats just asking for something not good to happen or if he is buying it before paying bills, thats is no bueno. However, if it is just hanging around the house relaxing, I would not worry too much about it. Its pot, not cocaine, heroin, or crank. The most that will happen is he may eat a box of twinkies play some video games and take a nap. There is also that, it sometimes make you really lazy it all depends on the person.

 

There are a lot of different views on this subject with the leagalization. I agree with FathomFear, the government will change the rules as soon as it knows how to takes its share of the profit.

 

It sounds like you are already having issues with it. You dont know what it is and you dont know how it effects you and this is a fair concern. Just be aware that if your family network is close....family gathering BBQ's things like that and they like to drop in out of the blue your boyfiried may not like that. And if they happen to come in and your boyfriends papers or other things just happen to be out, then there may be problems.

 

Its also age. In my early twenties it was very common for me to walk into a friends house anyday of the week and see their stuff on the table and they were smoking out, it was no big deal. But now later in life if they have it, they have it, if they dont they dont no big deal priorities change. Personally, I have outgrown it and am trying to hold onto the little short term memory I do have.

 

Do some research check out what the effects are. Im not telling you to smoke it. Hang out with him sometime and check out how he acts when he is high and make your decision form there. Just see how you feel around it. And if you dont like it, then move on.

 

The only one thing I will say is that if someone drops something else into the mix of smoking, I would walk away it only goes downhill from there. If you dont know what I mean I will tell you. Sometimes people will add things to the mix, this is called lacing. It may be called something else somewhere else, but 6 in one hand half a dozen in the other. Anyway things are put into the mix like coke, speed or "angle dust" PCP. I have not seen this happen for sometime, nor have I done it. Nor have I hung out with those people too long after I found out they were on it. So there are these and other things out there that people do to enhance their pot but all of these examples are pretty extreme and doing these sorts of things is just plain stupid. I am not saying these things to scare you, but these things do exist. Personally speaking, the worst thing I have witnessed from someone getting high was when a friend of mine got so sick from eating too many cherry bomb candies they threw up.

 

Talk to your boyfriend about how you feel and go from there.

 

good luck

[Fudgie]

I also want to add that regardless of you being accepting of the pot (maybe even smoking it) or just tolerating it with him, if you move in with him into an apartment, DO NOT LET HIM SMOKE INSIDE.

 

There are some really whistle-blowers and all you need is someone to call a cop, have them show up, and smell it everywhere! Even if cops aren't involved, the smell sticks around.

 

I think if you're going to smoke, do it outside in a secluded place or in your car and roll down the windows a little when you're done.

[jaysmaury]

Well you're in luck, because I actually did many extensive studies of marijuana in college. Yes, I studied this topic late into the evening hours, often to the point of exhaustion... I would sometimes be forced to eat unhealthy fast food due to a lack of time since I spent so much of my time studying THC and the effect on one's body. My friends and I would often study this topic together and pass our knowledge around the room. Then, many of the researchers would begin enlightening us on what they knew about marijuana, as if they were philosophy majors...

 

I can pretty much sum up my findings with the words of the great Nate Dogg: "SMOKE WEED EVERY DAY!"

 

Seriously though - I was a near-daily user for 5 YEARS! During that time I worked a full time job and attended college full time (which I paid for in full every semester with MY money - no student loans for me). I graduated with a 4.0 GPA debt-free and I am now making bank. Anyone who tells you it's dangerous is simply ignorant on the subject. It is WAY safer than alcohol.

[Atrium]

I also want to add that regardless of you being accepting of the pot (maybe even smoking it) or just tolerating it with him, if you move in with him into an apartment, DO NOT LET HIM SMOKE INSIDE.

 

There are some really whistle-blowers and all you need is someone to call a cop, have them show up, and smell it everywhere! Even if cops aren't involved, the smell sticks around.

 

I think if you're going to smoke, do it outside in a secluded place or in your car and roll down the windows a little when you're done.

Meh back in the day I used to crack the windows and use an air freshener to smoke while my parents weren't home. Usually the scent was gone in an hour or two.

 

Not advocating smoking inside by the way lol, probably wasn't the best idea.

[jaysmaury]

I also want to add that regardless of you being accepting of the pot (maybe even smoking it) or just tolerating it with him, if you move in with him into an apartment, DO NOT LET HIM SMOKE INSIDE.

 

There are some really whistle-blowers and all you need is someone to call a cop, have them show up, and smell it everywhere! Even if cops aren't involved, the smell sticks around.

 

I think if you're going to smoke, do it outside in a secluded place or in your car and roll down the windows a little when you're done.

 

Take a cardboard roll from a roll of toilet paper, stuff a couple sheets of fabric softener inside, and blow the smoke through there. Comes out the other end smelling like roses.

[Fudgie]

I guess if he's not stupid about it, then smoking inside may work. Just make sure the window's open and he's careful about the smell, OP. I don't think him smoking in a closed-window room on a couch is a good idea if yuo want the smell to dissipate.

 

Personally I am the outdoorsy sort, lol.

[Atrium]

Take a cardboard roll from a roll of toilet paper, stuff a couple sheets of fabric softener inside, and blow the smoke through there. Comes out the other end smelling like roses.

Ah a sploof. Haven't used one in ever. Haven't had to use one in forever.

[Furtive]

The answer to your question depends on that person, and you.

 

I've seen successful smokers and I've seen loser smokers. Is it the weed or the person?

 

I think it amplifies a person's personality, and if they're lazy and stupid...you get the point.

 

Personally, at my age and point in life I would be against living with someone that does it. I have too much to lose and, let's be honest: if you know they smoke and they're adults, they fit into my above example. Eventually intelligence tells us not to brag about 420 and plaster our cars with marijuana leaves. Just sayin'

[Lithp]

I'll echo what others are saying about it depends on the person. I used to smoke all the time... aaaaallllllll the tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime, and I was fine. If he's using it to cope with issues he should be dealing with, that's not good. If it's something that he can't function without - no good.

 

My boyfriend used to use it to cope with his depression, and while some would say it works for them, for him it did not. It made him worse, and he quickly devolved into someone who quit all his jobs, treated everyone like crap, and wouldn't get out of bed unless he was high. If your boyfriend is still able to function as a normal, decent human being, then I wouldn't think anything of it so long as he's be smart about it.

[amipushy]

I used to smoke it for many years and my advice is to spend time with him when he is stoned before you move in with him.

 

If he smokes really strong stuff, he will be in a different 'zone' to you, which may range from being just 'chilled out' to being a total zombie in the chair for most of the evening which may annoy you or turn you off completely.

[Atrium]

Smoking anything causes lung cancer. Pot causes brain damage even if the effects aren't seen until later in life that's a proven FACT.

 

Why move in with someone who breaks the law just because they don't agree with it?

Can I see the source to back up this FACT?

 

Also, LOL at "Pot".

[Atrium]

Weed is not proven to cause any sort of brain damage. Your source says that in the final sentence.

[Atrium]

It's quite possible that the brain damage which has been show to occur is permanent however the jury is still out.

 

The possibility exists that the demonstrated effects on the brain "may" be permanent. Why take the chance? Do you really need a mind altering substance that "might" cause brain damage that DOES cause lung cancer?

 

Why not just go without it and keep your mind clear and not risk the health effects?

 

Because you can't?

Why drive a car when walking is much safer?

 

Not everything in life is about taking the safest possible route. And until I get some sort of definitive, conclusive evidence on it (cause every time I read up on the possible negative effects of cannabis, there's tons and tons of contradicting reports) I'm not going to worry about it. Tons of people do it and I never hear bad personal stories. It's only nonsense like Reefer Madness that claims it's bad

 

Also, about smoking weed and lung cancer:

 

link removed

 

However, recent studies have shown that there are no links between the regular smoking of marijuana and cancer.[75][76]