I can't deal with this...

[shmegecky]

I can't stop crying right now. This relationship has been nothing short of tumultuous. We were together for a year, and he was a wonderful boyfriend. He cheated on me once though and told me about it. I had serious trust issue there after. A few months ago I broke up with him because I couldn't trust him. Ever since then it's been a roller coaster ride and we can never seem to be on the same page at the same time. Two weeks ago, he called me saying he couldn't live without me etc. Driving through a tropical storm to come see me. He said he wanted to be with me again, and I told him I didn't know. He said we couldn't keep doing this to each other if I didn't know then the answer was no. Now only two weeks later I had heard that he might be seeing someone else. So I texted him and he made it seem like he wasn't, so I called him and confessed my love and need to be with him back to him last night, but then he told me he is talking to the this other girl. Basically he denied getting back with me so he could pursue a relationship with this new girl. I just don't understand... 2 weeks. Just two weeks ago.. and now when I was talking to him about her he was like "you don't know her, don't talk about her." Like he's changed alliances, when for the last year and particularly two weeks ago he was so adamant about needing to be with me. I just can't understand 2 weeks, just 2 weeks. He was so passionate for me two weeks ago. How do I deal with this pain?

[Madamdiva007]

I'm sorry you're having to go through this, but if he cheated on you, he probably wasn't that great of a guy to begin with.

[DN]

Well could he not argue that 2 weeks ago you didn't want him and now you do (once you found out he was moving on)?

 

It could be that he had met this girl, was attracted to her and thought he would try one more time with you. When you rejected him then he decided he would move on and see what there might be with her and now doesn't want to hurt her.

 

If you can't get past his cheating then this would never work anyway. (BTW, I am not defending his cheating)

 

I think your best bet is to assume it is over for good and begin to move on.

[loulou37]

hey hunny,

 

can i ask what is your ages?

[Liraele]

You can and you will. I know that probably sounds a bit harsh, but you're stronger than you think.

 

People change all the time... it's a fact of life. Cry your tears, vent your anger and frustration, and then take a long hard look at what you want for YOU. Not WHO you want - don't put a face or a name to it - but WHAT you want. Chances are damn good that it isn't your ex, when you look at things objectively.

 

 

Hang in there honey, and it'll get easier to bear.

[shmegecky]

I'm 24 and he's 20. Another part of the story I was too exhausted to write earlier, this girl that he's talking to now, was just messing around with one of his best friends. Now my ex doesn't want to believe it happened, even though his best friend and me are telling him it did happen. She's brainwashed my ex into believing that she never hooked up with his best friend, when everyone else knows it did happen. I've realized there's nothing I can do at this point. This girl in the matter of a weekend has manipulated my ex into thinking his friends are lying and his ex (me) cannot be trusted. This is insanity. I feel like I've entered the twilight zone.

[greywolf]

I'm 24 and he's 20. Another part of the story I was too exhausted to write earlier, this girl that he's talking to now, was just messing around with one of his best friends. Now my ex doesn't want to believe it happened, even though his best friend and me are telling him it did happen. She's brainwashed my ex into believing that she never hooked up with his best friend, when everyone else knows it did happen. I've realized there's nothing I can do at this point. This girl in the matter of a weekend has manipulated my ex into thinking his friends are lying and his ex (me) cannot be trusted. This is insanity. I feel like I've entered the twilight zone.

 

At this point, it really is none of your business who your ex dates. I know that sounds harsh, but you did have your chance to work things out with him.

 

Having said that, I think that if you were telling him you were unsure, he would've waited longer if he was really serious about you considering he was the one that screwed up. When you screw up that bad, waiting awhile for the person you love to decide what to do is not a huge thing to ask, IMO.