stlewis1218 Posted September 23, 2011 Share Posted September 23, 2011 So i took my time posting something like this because i thought i was getting better over the last week, and now i here i am ready to break down. Someone already posted to something like the way I'm feeling to a tee. This girl and i have been off again on again for almost the last 9 years. I know I'll get flak for this, i get plenty from my friends. We've both dated between each other and slept with other people. The relationship wasn't healthy, i know. And familiarity made it to easy. we finally tried living together and it didn't work, and tried to see each other more time this summer. It all kept falling part, Insert no duh here. Even though its blatantly obvious this needed to end, she's been my whole life, the length of our relationship spans more time than most marriages now a days, and can't help but remember all the time we spent together. This has me feel cruel and insecure. I no longer have the confidence to talk to women unless approached, and that doesn't happen with me. I'm angry, bitter, paranoid and stressed. The biggest thing plenty of people say is to sleep with someone and it makes it easier. I still feel like I'm doing something wrong by considering it. I have dreampt about this chick almost every night for the past two weeks. I even feel * * * * * y towards my friends, like I'm being let down. Unreturned phone calls, lengths of time where no one calls me i call them. i keep a relatively small circle and trying to build but my paranoia has me in an instant gratification need. I know i'm asking for it when i post this, I try to talk myself through it, and i know the answers but i won't listen to myself. I'm looking for advice or just something. Thanks for your time Link to comment
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