Can you really trust your SO?

[Evillink88]

My fiancee and I have been together for 4 years now. We have been in a LDR for 3 years now. I really do believe that my woman is a really good person. I trust her completely and she is honest with me. I remember when she broke up with me and after we got back together she told me she was attracted to a classmate/colleague of hers' from school. That was during the break up period. The guy was also attracted to her. I had asked if she ever slept with him and she told me no. Naturally, I was thinking that she broke up with me to experiment with another guy or maybe she was seeing someone else since we were 140 miles apart. Can anyone in a relationship/marriage ever trust their partner 100%? I would like to think my fiancee would never think of cheating on me.

[OptomisticGirl]

I trust my LD fiance 100%, so much so he has 2 women as room mates in his shared house.

[Princess123]

Usually when you have that feeling, you trust your feelings. But that is like a way to "cheat" essentially in my eyes. A break up period of someone asking to wait for them and they go experiment is like permission to cheat but its not cheating because your not together. Just having you there as a back up or a come back after the experiment is done. In that case no. If I were to marry someone I would have to have no lack of trust and a 100% committed relationship to each other without break ups.

[Staple]

Anyone who trusted a LDR person in a relationship is stupid. The only reason someone in a LDR won't cheat is because they don't have anyone to cheat with. Your fiance probably slept with the guy.

[OptomisticGirl]

Anyone who trusted a LDR person in a relationship is stupid. The only reason someone in a LDR won't cheat is because they don't have anyone to cheat with. Your fiance probably slept with the guy.

 

I take it you have had bad luck with LDRs?

[greywolf]

I don't think people ever really trust someone 100%. People trust while things are going well, but as soon as people start acting suspicious, that 100% trust is gone pretty fast.

[iamevan]

I would think your gf was likely faithful up until the "breakup". In my experience, girls/women already have their sights set on someone before they breakup. They may ride out a relationship for a little while until they feel the odds of being with the next guy to be fairly certain. I don't know how long you two had a break but I'd assume she had sex with someone in that time. Most likely she just wanted a clear conscience about being with someone else and doesn't want to hurt you. She gets to sow some oats and can come back to you whenever. I do think some people can be trusted no matter what. There are some very faithful people out there. They are in the minority though. But I would say even if something happened she was good about things and tried to handle it in the best way possible. Sometimes the timing isn't perfect when we are with someone. Maybe we have some living to do before completely settling down. If it happened now, better now than after being married for 8 years and having 2 kids. If a person is wondering "what if" too much it can ruin a marriage. Maybe this would mean she will never ask "what if?".