Ready for Dating?

[Flyingpiglet]

When is the right time to think about dating again?

When can you say you are truly over your ex?

 

So, I don’t think about him nearly as much, but my heart still aches a little when I do.

I don’t have any urge to contact him, but I do keep hoping he contacts me.

I’ve accepted that it’s over, but would still take him back in a heartbeat.

I still miss him, but its getting harder and harder to remember exactly why.

 

I want to try dating again but I don’t want to do it just to fill a void.

But then I wonder… Will I always think about him like this until I am with someone else?

 

It may well be a moot point; I was three years single before, not all of it through choice…

[ApocalypseDreams]

I think you will continue to think about your ex until you open yourself up to the possibility of meeting someone else. That could be in the form of casually dating.

[banal]

Once you're willing to not accept him back 'in a heartbeat,' at the very least. I wouldn't say you're over him until you got to the point where, if he did call and ask to take another chance, you honestly could say "no thanks." How unfair is it to the people you're dating if you're not at this point?

 

I feel you can get to this point without filling the void with another person...

[In the Dark]

When you no longer have the feeling that you would ditch the next person to get back with your ex if he comes back.

You just have to be certain of that before dating the next person.

 

But it can be hard if there was no strong reason to stay away from him.

[Flyingpiglet]

Whilst I agree on some level, I wouldn’t want to intentionally ‘use’ someone to make me feel better… This is my sticking point

 

I feel that, although I would accept him back should he ask at the moment, if I were to date other people and found someone who I cared to move onto second and third dates with etc then I would no longer take him back.

 

I’m not sure how relevant it is but my last ex was not a LTR (it transpired he was emotionally unavailable) so I never really figured out if we could have made a proper go of things together.

 

But, if someone else made me feel the way that I now know I can, then I would invest my time and energy in them alone

 

I guess I want to meet the person that shows me there is ‘better’ for me out there and that this wasn’t my one shot.

 

Hmmm, wish I was better at explaining myself

[ks240030]

It took me 3 months to get over my 1.5 year relationship with my ex-boyfriend.

 

1) So, I don’t think about him nearly as much, but my heart still aches a little when I do.

 

-You will feel this ache for a little while but it cannot consume you.

 

2) I don’t have any urge to contact him, but I do keep hoping he contacts me.

 

- You will keep hoping for a while but it will erase over time.

 

3) I’ve accepted that it’s over, but would still take him back in a heartbeat.

 

- This indicates that you are not over him. I knew from day one of the breakup that I would never take him back.

 

4) I still miss him, but its getting harder and harder to remember exactly why.

 

- That means that you are in the healing process still.

[Flyingpiglet]

3) I’ve accepted that it’s over, but would still take him back in a heartbeat.

 

- This indicates that you are not over him. I knew from day one of the breakup that I would never take him back.

 

 

Does this not, to some extent, depend on the circumstance of the breakup? I know I'm clutching at straws... I just really want to move on but am aware I have to be honest with myself at the same time.... For everybodies sake!