lostNnotfound Posted September 20, 2011 Share Posted September 20, 2011 Hey Everyone, This will probably be a long read for some, but I would certainly appreciate it if you could read the whole story, and give me some direction on where I can go from here. I am 25 so is my girlfriend (FYI) I was with my ex for four and a half years, we were engaged planning a wedding and owned our townhouse had the date for the wedding picked (10.10.10) In September of 2009 I called the relationship off. It was nothing to do with "commitment issues" or anything of that sort, she was just the not person that I fell in love with. I started making a lot more money, and it became all about status and money for her. I being nothing like that decided that it was an unhealthy relationship and path I didn't want to go down. I then began talking to my elementary school crush from K-4 on Facebook, we exchanged numbers and began talking quite a bit. Once my ex was gone and out of the house we then started meeting/dating. Obviously like any new relationship I though i was the luckiest guy going form something so bad and horrible to some one so great. We communicated like I had never talked to someone in any relationship the way I could talk to her. We have been together now for two years. About sixteen months ago we moved in together. I had a job opportunity that came available to move 4 hours away from all of our friends and family (this is where she wanted to move to before the job opportunity came up) so we both moved up here, have been up here for 10 months on our own with family visiting every few months either them coming up here or us going down there. Now as far as our relationship we have had a few differences that we have worked through, and as a whole we are both extremely happy the way it is, or so I thought. I love her and care for her a great deal. But this is where it gets confusing. I am having troubles seeing or being excited to see the though of proposing and getting married taking that ever so important next step. If I had to lay out the qualities of a perfect partner, and someone that I would want to grow old with and have kids with it would be my girlfriend i am with now down to a T. But i can't get past the feeling of that next step and me saying I want to take it but not actually taking it. I feel as though i am extremely committed to her now, we made that move away from our families and are living together. I am happy with that, she is not she wants the next step and thats where we are on two different pages. I feel as though I love her and I am happy with the relationship the way it is, but of course its unfair of me to "string her along" I just want to be as fair to her as I can be, figure out why i am having problems with proposing. Should I be ready after two years I think so, why am I not? The though of loosing her makes me sad and afraid, afraid that for some reason I just can't get there to the next step and I am going to loose it all because of that. I could be making the mistake of my life only to realize down the road that time made me ready and that she is the one that I do want to marry etc. Also I do not want to be single, I do not want to date other people, none of that nonsense is making any of this harder for me. I love her and i am so happy right now and I thought that was good enough? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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