giraffe1 Posted September 20, 2011 Share Posted September 20, 2011 My girlfriend and I have been together for 6 years. We love each other very much and own a house together. Until the last few months, I was convinced she was the girl I wanted to marry. We have talked about marriage and children a lot and she is very keen on them. We are both quite laid back and liberal in our relationship. We both go out with our own groups of friends, sometimes clubbing, and sometimes go out together, mixing groups of friends. She has cheated on my once in the past - about 2 years in. Our relationship seemed to be going well but one night she came home and said she had kissed a stranger in a nightclub and gone back to his house. She said she was very drunk but they did not have sex. She was wracked with guilt, told me straight away and I believe her entirely. I know that she told me the truth here. Recently, we have been on a few nights out together. Even when I'm there, if she's drunk, she always likes to be the centre of attention and clearly enjoys the attention of other men. This hurts to see. Whilst she's not dirty dancing with them, when she's drunk, she acts like a singleton. We hardly see each other during the week because she works extremely long hours. But when she does have spare time, she prioritises doing things with her friends over doing things with me. I don't want to stop her from going out with her friends, but we rarely have time together alone apart from at bedtime. As a result, we rarely have sex. She has just got back from a girly weekend to a European city with friends. As soon as she got home, she told me they had all been to a sex club - a nightclub but where some people are dressed in fetish gear and some (but not all) people are having open sex with strangers. She was saying this in a "isn't this funny" kind of way - she and her friends had gone there at the end of the night to see what it was like - but I felt very hurt. There's no suggestion she actually participated in anything (I know she'd feel really guilty and would tell me if she did). But it still feel very painful to me. I enjoy going out with my friends and together with her. And everyone likes some attention from the opposite sex from time to time. But I don't seem to need it as much as her. I've been to a strip club before with friends as part of something similar to a batchelor party, but only early on in the relationship - and I think going for a night out in a place where strangers are having open sex is a step too far. I'm generally very liberal in our relationship but the timing at which this has come has hit me hard. I can't imagine life apart from her but I feel hurt. Please help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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