JohnnyxHorror Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 The one thing I can never figure out is how all these guys manage to walk into a place and pick up more women then you could count. I dont understand how they exactly are capable of doing this because i seem to try and fail over and over. I dont really know what i do wrong either, but I've been single for quite a while now and I've been strolling around places and talking to people that seem like they'd be interesting. But nothing ever happens, I seem to always fail at meeting someone. In fact I got so annoyed by it I decided "hey lets try one of these online dating sites" so I went around looking for a free one because I dont want to waste money on something that doesn't work. So I sent a few messages out to people that seemed interesting and I never got a response. I try to just spark a conversation with women about something that THEY are interested in and try going from there but yet I hit the dumps. I sometimes I wonder is it my looks? personality? I'm just not sure at this point. suppose this counts as venting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Its all about confidence and an attitude of indifference. You need to have a solid inner game down before you can walk in and pick up x number of girls. I personally find it easier to treat every no as a no and move on, play the numbers game, if you hit on 50 girls, you are bound to get a positive results. So turn the table around, behave like she is the one hitting on you and you can take it or leave it at anytime. The other thing to do is make it look like a lot of other girls are interested in talking to you (you can manufacture that situation by going back and forth between groups of girls asking them about some controversial opinion, and use 1 group's answer on the other group), this way you create the impression that you are in high demand and women are automatically more attracted to guys that other girls find attractive. All of those boils down to have a solid inner game, the solid confidence, if you lack of confidence women will feel like and reject you. So I suggest you boost your confidence first. Lastly, practice makes perfect, go out and practice approaching women, dont offer to buy them a drink, aim to make them laugh while demonstrate that you are in a higher social status than them. PS, regarding internet dating, do things that are completely different than other dudes on the site. Trust me, if you are a woman, you most probably get 50+ emails a day from different guys talking about same lame thing, dont believe me, set up a fake profile pretending to be a good looking girl and see what the guys email you about, find a pattern from those emails and do the complete opposite when you actually do send the emails out to girls in real life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
resilient7 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 ^^^ great advice Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
22n32 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 confidence,attiude and right swagger.. those are important for getting and keeping a women.. granted on the first impression looks do matter.. girls will know first few min if ur worthy of there attention.. example im 6,4 when i go out or anywhere in public i get noticed, bars i have women coming up too me.. BUT thats not gonna keep the women around. that only pulls em in.. confiedence, right attuide is what will keep em wanting more.. sadly we live in a visul soceity.. i have a buddy 5,7 good looking guy, good guy.. when we go out he gets no attention.. just be a good guy, believe in yourself, have the right attidute and right women will come along and see that and appricate it.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 OP, you sounded like you are single and wishing you are not. There is an air of desperation in your tone, girls can smell that and its a huge turn off. Start finding joy in being single, start believing that you are single because you choose to to be single. Confidence, aloofness and humor are huge turn on, start walking with a swagger, behaving like you dont care if she likes you or not and you while make her laugh would see better results. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Guys who walk in and get tons of girls are generally guys with tons of charisma. And it isn't something they got from a pick up artist book either. It's simply something they were born with. They are usually pretty good looking to. I guess you could say they are gifted people. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Guys who walk in and get tons of girls are generally guys with tons of charisma. And isn't something they got from a pick up artist book either. It's simply something they were born with. They are usually pretty good looking to. I guess you could say they are gifted people. Not entirely true. I was not born with gift, I had to work hard (over 500 approaches) to get that skill. Anyone can get the skill if they put in time and effort and practice it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
22n32 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Guys who walk in and get tons of girls are generally guys with tons of charisma. And isn't something they got from a pick up artist book either. It's simply something they were born with. They are usually pretty good looking to. I guess you could say they are gifted people. This is very true.. it kind of has to come naturaly.. u cant fake it till u make it.... its not that there gifted.. its a combo of genes, generation of right father and mother fig.. its evolution.. selection of the finest.. intresting story.. my father did a family tree of our family for the past 200yrs.. and the whole time my family has only produced males.. last 200yrs its simply crazy.. i believe its one reason im 6,4.. lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Not entirely true. I was not born with gift, I had to work hard (over 500 approaches) to get that skill. Anyone can get the skill if they put in time and effort and practice it. Sorry, I believe that charisma is something you either have or you don't. Having the ability to approach a woman is something you can work on, but not charisma. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Sorry, I believe that charisma is something you either have or you don't. Having the ability to approach a woman is something you can work on, but not charisma. Confidence is big part of that charisma, that one can be gained through practice and success. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thejigsup Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 The guys who attract us have a certain something about them. They can talk to us without any signs of nervousness. They are generally charming and funny! Sorry, but a guy who stutters, stumbles, and isn't a great conversationalist is not going to get lucky. Looks aren't as important as ATTITUDE. Don't memorize cheesy lines, you have to be able to ad lib. I know this sounds harsh, but you wanted the truth. Guys with game can be really nice guys, too. My late bf could walk into any room and charm the pants off of everyone. So can I. We zeroed in on each other instantly and were together for many, many, years. We never go bored talking to each other. THAT is the key. Be a great conversationalist and you can be less than handsome and still get the girls. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
resilient7 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 How would you go about practicing it swifty? How does one become a great conversationalist jigsup?....reading lots perhaps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Confidence is big part of that charisma, that one can be gained through practice and success. I think alot of the charisma is something they already have, the confidence just makes it more noticeable. I'm not a charismamatic person, and can be rather quiet around crowds because it makes me feel uncomfortable. You either have it or you don't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 It was after 100+ times I approached a group of girls (or mixed group) that I got my fear of approaching strangers in a group out of my system, then it was easy. If you get nervous, you can always leave because you are not gonna see those people again. Simple. Have something rehearsed to say to them, talk to the entire group instead of focusing on 1 person. Keep doing it till you are not nervous about it anymore Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I think alot of the charisma is something they already have, the confidence just makes it more noticeable. I'm not a charismamatic person, and can be rather quiet around crowds because it makes me feel uncomfortable. You either have it or you don't. I can tell you right now that is not true. I used to be like that but you but not anymore. Anything can be changed, I guarantee you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 The guys who attract us have a certain something about them. They can talk to us without any signs of nervousness. They are generally charming and funny! Sorry, but a guy who stutters, stumbles, and isn't a great conversationalist is not going to get lucky. Looks aren't as important as ATTITUDE. Don't memorize cheesy lines, you have to be able to ad lib. I know this sounds harsh, but you wanted the truth. Guys with game can be really nice guys, too. My late bf could walk into any room and charm the pants off of everyone. So can I. We zeroed in on each other instantly and were together for many, many, years. We never go bored talking to each other. THAT is the key. Be a great conversationalist and you can be less than handsome and still get the girls. Good speaking ability I think is important. Someone who can speak very clear. I have a tendency to mumble and generally have never had a good voice. It was something I use to get alot of crap for growing up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 How does one become a great conversationalist jigsup?....reading lots perhaps. Do what stand up comedians do. They opens with a short joke, build rapport with audience then going on longer routines. Its not what you say its how you say it, so practice speaking slowly and clearly. Have something to say pre-planned and anticipates different outcomes and how would you respond to each and every of them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I can tell you right now that is not true. I used to be like that but you but not anymore. Anything can be changed, I guarantee you. Sorry, but not everyones personality is geared towards that. I'd have to change my personality, which is impossible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Sorry, but not everyones personality is geared towards that. I'd have to change my personality, which is impossible. Fair enough, nothing is impossible, you just afraid to try, but I digress, to each their own. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thejigsup Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 It can be done, but it will never come naturally to someone unless they are born with it. I can tell when it has been rehearsed or learned. Not a bad thing, but I prefer the real deal. Some of my friends don't care if a guy is a deaf mute as long as he is tall with a good body. Some only want guys with lots of money. I have one friend who only likes shy guys. I like the talkative, witty type and that is what most girls like. Have you tried talking to girls who aren't an 8 or up? Sometimes the plainer girls are treasures that no one makes the effort to get to know. The good looking ladies usually have their pick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ms Darcy Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 While I appreciate a guy who walks up and talks to me with confidence, I find a guy who stumbles a little and is nervous endearing. It takes courage to approach and I always appreciate that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 It can be done, but it will never come naturally to someone unless they are born with it. I can tell when it has been rehearsed or learned. Not a bad thing, but I prefer the real deal. Some of my friends don't care if a guy is a deaf mute as long as he is tall with a good body. Some only want guys with lots of money. I have one friend who only likes shy guys. I like the talkative, witty type and that is what most girls like. Have you tried talking to girls who aren't an 8 or up? Sometimes the plainer girls are treasures that no one makes the effort to get to know. The good looking ladies usually have their pick. I know that I don't even try to talk to the super hot girls. It's kinda pointless to try to join the basketball team if you are clumsy and without coordination. I personally would probably do even worse if I tried to rehearse. I simply just ackward around people i've never met before, and will always be that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 I know that I don't even try to talk to the super hot girls. It's kinda pointless to try to join the basketball team if you are clumsy and without coordination. I personally would probably do even worse if I tried to rehearse. I'm simply just ackward around people i've never met before, and will always be that way. And you shall never succeed in landing a super hot girl with that mentality. You cant hit the ball unless you swing your bat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jonny15 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 And you shall never succeed in landing a super hot girl with that mentality. You cant hit the ball unless you swing your bat. Sorry, but the only way i'm getting a super hot girl is if I win the lottery. A 1 does not get a 10 in the real world, just in Adam Sandler movies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CMS Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Sorry, but the only way i'm getting a super hot girls is if I win the lottery. A 1 does not get a 10 in the real world, just in Adam Sandler movies. dude wow, just wow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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