Jimmyjam070 Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 Hey guys I met this girl at a party, we hit it off and I took her home that night. It was a perfect beginning. From the start though, I didn't get my hopes up or try to get too close in case it was just a casual thing. Anyways, we kept hooking up afterwards and we've been together now for almost two months approaching the end of the month. I really like her but she's actually much younger than me. I'm 25 and working and she's a senior in college, 21. I feel kind of weird with this situation but I guess it's fine... but some people in my life look down upon it. Anyways, we pretty much text each other everyday and such and hang alot during week nights, hooking up and me sleeping over. I've pretty much been playing it like I'm whatever, she can do what she wants and when she wants me to come hang I'll hang with her. Obviously I have more feelings than that though. When she goes out on the weekends and I don't hear from her I get down. And I worry she's just kind of using me during the week and doing her own thing like a regular college girl on the weekends. But also, she wants to hang with me on the weekends sometimes, but I actually work nights during the weekend so it makes things difficult. Plus I don't always feel comfortable either going to college parties or bringing her out with my friends just because I'm not that good with social situations. I get jealous real easy and she seems like the flirty type and she might flirt with my friends and upset me. I guess this is a controlling aspect of our relationship since I don't let us hang together too much on the weekend but I only do it because I'm afraid I might lose my cool around other people. And I still don't know if I can trust her, and I don't want to be hurt. Regardless I guess it's a testament to how I care for her. But she pretty much ignored me all weekend....Friday she went out to a college party....she said it wasn't that fun etc. and that she ended up just going to a bar with one of her gfs and staying up and smoking till 4am.....but she would randomly text me (I was trying to just ignore her to not think about her at some frat party or something) and she would text me then not respond till way later. I was asleep and she texte round 2 a sad face implying she was sad I wasn't with her but it was still annoying and I texted "? What do you want? I'm tryin to sleep." She didnt respond till 4 "so hostile, yada" Anyways I feel like I'm losing my cool. At this point she knows I have feelings for her and I seem weak. Like I cant get another girl or like I'm insecure. I wish I could just hook up with her and focus on other things when she's not around like work. but she's the best girl I have going and even when I try to meet other girls I havent been as successful yet. And when I feel sad I can hardly focus. Thats why I'm laying in bed right now and not doing my errands right now. So Saturday she invited me up to her parents party with her cous and my somehwat friend Adam....I just don't feel comfortable with that stuff yet too. I feel like I'm going to embarrass myself but I feel like I'm just being a coward but I'm really socially anxious and awkward sometimes and I'm afraid if I make a fool of myself I'll lose her. I had work anyway so I couldn't go...but at the same time I don't think she expected me to say yes....Saturday she said she was coming home, but she said she was going to sleep there instead, and her texts were all over the place....then Sunday she went to the Pats with those two people and some other dude out of the blue she said.....that's fine but it was kinda lame I guess....then Sunday night we met up at a show and we stayed for like 30 minutes and I took her home.....instead of staying and cuddling I played like I had to wake up early and didn't give her much affection like she wanted....so that's how I played it....basically I'm not gonna shell my love into her if she's just using me during the week and partying on the weekend meeting other people.....but at the same time I guess I could have been hanging with her during the weekend. But I don't know if I'm ready for that and I hate how girls make you jump through hoops for them. I can't help if I have feelings and get sad. But even in the beginning I told myself not to get so attached. She's just one of the best girls I've had in awhile. Anyways how do you think I should play it.....I'm gonna wait for her to hit me up and my plan is to be less affectionate and more focused on just having fun while we're free. I wish we could just decide to be friends with benefits but I'm afraid to label what we are or have that convo. I'm just rolling with the punches. Adios I'm going to get a coffee now. I'll keep you posted help me out here. Link to comment
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.