cmupitt Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 My Story: Had a 2.5 year relationship with my ex, who is a very nice and caring guy. At the end of the relationship, I became needy and clingy and he broke up with me because of built up resentment. During the whole relationship he treated me so nicely that he was not behaving himself -- never say "no" to me, never express his feelings. It went to a point where he could not stand it any more. When we broke up he said he pretended that he was happy in the relationship but never feeling rewarding and appreciated. He said he never express his negative feelings and it has accumulated to such a point that it is impossible to continue. I was very shocked to hear all these things because I thought we were in a Perfect relationship. I went NC immediately. After around 2.5 months I bumped into him. He seemed very excited and happy. We had lots of eye contacts and I was able to feel the spark. I hinted to him that I miss him tremendously and he happily responded. I invited him to eat with me again one week later and he agreed with happiness. Again, a nice and beautiful evening, with lots of sparks. He mentioned the things we did together many times and seemed so happy. We even talked about going to a movie together the following week. Anyway, he was definitely into me at that moment and we were super happy. The turning point came when I started to apologize to him about the problems that I had in our relationship. He seemed indifferent to my sincere apology. Then he said I have been questioning my decision for such a long time for my decision to breakup with you, but now I think it is the right decision." I was devastated to hear that and asked him You know about my attempts to get back why are you seeing me?" He said I am just too nice, and I don't want to reject you." Then I began a long speech on why we should be together. At the end, he said You are giving me too much pressure. You know, you look very unattractive right now. You are needy and clingy and I have not seen any change. I have not got over the resentment to you, I need time. You are pushing me too hard. I have feelings for you, but I don't want to go back with you. Go move on with your life." Don't know whether I was rejected because I pour my heart to him too quickly? Or he was so determined that no matter what I try and how I behave he will reject me anyway. I am sad, but not as bad as I thought. Actually I feel a big stone has been lifted from my heart. It is better to lose hope than having a bit of a hope. I made the mistakes that people have warned again and again on this board, but I tried my best. At that point, I wanted to go back with him too much to control myself or pretend that I don't care. Well, NC again, I guess. Link to comment
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