Clumsy Llama Posted September 19, 2011 Share Posted September 19, 2011 So I've been reading posts on this site for years (even though I never posted!) and have noticed a need some real statistics or studies on relationships. I don't know if anyone has seen this, but I found this study on relational reconciliations and found it interesting. As usual, keep in mind that this is just one study and has many limitations. I can't seem to post the link but I'll summarize it because because most research articles are dry anyway. The article is called Romantic Reconciliation as Influenced by Implicit Theories of Relationships and Information Seeking Style and should be the first thing to come up on a google search. People often gravitate towards one of these ways of thinking Destiny Theorists - They believe people are either "meant to be" or not. They want to perceive their partner as "ideal". When they find a flaw or there is a negative event, they either ignore/reframe the flaw or separate (determining that the relationship is not meant to be, rather than repairing). They may have high expectations and be less satisfied because of this. They are more likely to believe that things (personality, traits..) are fixed. Growth Theorists - These people believe that any relationship can be successful with work and dedication. They like to work on the problems and analyze the reasons for it. They are more likely to believe people and traits can be changed. Information-Seeking Styles Monitoring Monitors like to seek information, regardless of whether they are positive or not. I'm interpreting this as meaning those of you who like to stay in contact with your ex's and check up on them to get information (facebook, mutual friends, etc). They report lower anxiety with a larger amount of information/communication (reduces uncertainty). The researcher's theory was that growth theorists are more likely to be monitors, and this hypothesis was supported by the results. Blunting Blunters prefer to not have any information. They would rather have a high level of uncertainty to avoid finding out something negative. They are more likely to ignore negative information and choose to focus on the positive. Hence, they are more likely to view the break-up in a positive way by reframing the event. The researcher's theory was that Destiny Theorists are more likely to be blunters. However, the results actually showed that this was not the case. Destiny Theorists were less likely to avoid information! 1) Growth theorists and Destiny theorists actually did not differ in the degree of desire for reconciliation, which is the opposite of the the researchers predicted. 2) Blunters are less likely to reconcile than Monitors. This may be do to the communication behaviors. Since blunters tend to avoid communication, they are less likely to reconcile. Monitors, on the other hand, tend to have increased interaction with their ex therefore "setting the stage" for reconciliation. This can be an interesting point to bring up in the NC debate. 3) Sample size was 217 students from general education classes at a unversity. I feel like this limits the study in many ways because most of the participants are probably in their early 20s and I don't feel that would accurately represent other age groups. All of these participants were required to have been in a break up within the last 4 months and the relationship must have lasted at least 4 weeks. 4) The average length of the relationships were 13 months. I find this VERY interesting. What do you think happens after a year? Do you think the year milestone puts stress and pressure on people? I think people, especially those commitment phobes, might panic or get bored after a year. Anyway, I would love to hear your opinions on this! If you want more details, read the study. Where do you think you fall in these categories (of course you can be a little bit of both!)? Link to comment
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.