Im gay and im InLove with a straight what should i do?

[xPancakesx]

Hello im just gonna tell about my self,

Im gay and im inlove with this guy in my school I dont how to tell him.. I see him getting girls touch his face while i watch and get jealous.

i have known him for about a year we hang out everytime in school. But he keeps talking about girls and how they are well.. (sexy)

He doesnt know that im inlove with him and he doesnt know that im gay too , Maybe one of my best friends know that im gay but its very confusing (sometimes he thinks i am and i am not), I honestly

cant tell anyone that im gay in my school they would endlessly pick on me ._. .

The very hard part is not telling him how i feel about him, We sit always together in class he wants me to sit with him i help him every-time i can ... Whenever our hand touch his hand is so warm and

i feel i wanna keep touching it forever.

 

Now im just Blending in and talking to him, I wanna tell him that i am in love with him but how? it might ruined our Friendship or if he would tell everyone that im gay and such.

Tried moving on but he keeps talking to me Cant forget about him.. I dont know what to do, Sometimes i think i should just go Kill my self for being this jealous...

 

Please Help me how to tell him and what should i do

[shuttlefish]

So you're in love with someone who can't or won't love you back? Welcome to the club. It's a club called "everybody" and almost everybody is in it (or has been at one time).

 

It hurts to watch others give attention to the one you love, attention that you are aching to give them? Yeah, that is one of the elements of the club as well - an important part. Want to tell them the truth but can't? Another important part of the club.

 

This club is not exclusive, all races, all creeds, all orientations, all religions, short, tall, man, woman, hot, ugly ..... everyone is invited.

 

What can you do? Just let it run it's course. Tough it out, and rejoice in the fact that you feel anything at all...because to no longer feel...well, that is the sad part

 

Good luck!

[FathomFear]

I wouldn't beat yourself up too much. I think most gays and lesbians fall for a straight person at least once. It's hard to avoid, considering there are so many of them running around--lol.

 

I think the learning here is that you need to stop yourself from fantasizing romantically when it comes to straight guys. Appreciating them as eye candy is fine--I do that all the time. But if you start fantasizing about giving them affection and/or them returning the affection, you're just creating a fantasy world that's only going to put you in awkward situations like this one.

[Kaytie]

I wouldn't beat yourself up too much. I think most gays and lesbians fall for a straight person at least once. It's hard to avoid, considering there are so many of them running around--lol.

 

Ha! So true. It's never happened to me though - there is a huge difference in identity and way of being...

 

OP, it's like anyone else you can't have (whether straight or just plain unavailable) - you just have to stop yourself from fantasizing or you will be disappointed and hurt. I am not sure telling him will help you at all, although I do understand where you're coming from.

[lukeb]

The only thing that could be a concern is that you are "in love" with him because he is straight, in other words not like you. That there is some internalized homophobia at play here. You are in highschool so there is a lot of time to sort these feelings out. I am not saying that is the case here, but it could be.

[xPancakesx]

Thank you for Telling this rlly Helped me thanks alot ;3 ... Just gonna find friends to forget about him , will take time but i guess its both good for us/or me

 

 

Thanks alot