22n32 Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Its been over a week, since i put my foot down and told her to stop calling me.. she has respected it.. its just one of those days, i woke up thinking about her.. and just been down all day.. suucks...... Link to comment
Acrylamide Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Just another one of those days. Passed two nights I had dreams about her... I'm not even safe in my dreams. Keep your head up. Link to comment
BrokenNYC Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 We all go through it - I too am having a crappier day. It's part of the roller-coaster ride of breaking up. You just gotta take some comfort in knowing it will get better. You have some bad days on the road to recovery, but tomorrow may be a lot better, and that's what you have to concentrate on - getting to those better days. Everything happens for a reason - even these crappier days have their purpose. Good luck. Link to comment
Imprimatur Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 When people tell me "everything happens for a reason" it is of little comfort. Perhaps because I don't know what the reason is, or blame myself for the reason. I do agree it gets better. Ask me a month or even a week ago and I wouldn't agree, but the last couple days have been a little better. I am impatient for total healing! I consume everything I can read now, and probably going to be an expert in the subject soon, -just unable to take my own advice! I suspect it has to do with idealization of her. I can't imagine finding a better fit for me, but I will keep at the dating scene and get tough (or I will crumble and hope to find a better person. Relationships can be the most painful or the most wonderful events to happpen to us. I am not ready to stop gambling that I can find the same kind of love again. Link to comment
RubyWoo Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I'm falling apart today as well... I'm actually sitting here crying and shaking trying to convice myself not to call and say I love him and I want him to come back home Link to comment
Airbag Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I'm falling apart today as well... I'm actually sitting here crying and shaking trying to convice myself not to call and say I love him and I want him to come back home Don't contact him, please. You will only feel embarrassed later. Link to comment
RubyWoo Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I'm trying, but I miss him soooooo bad. We have been together for so many years, I feel so lonely Link to comment
Airbag Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I'm trying, but I miss him soooooo bad. We have been together for so many years, I feel so lonely Remember that you are not alone. Almost everyone on this forum is feeling or felt like you at one point. Stay strong! Link to comment
22n32 Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 I feel the same way.. there was no other girl better fit for me.. so I'm prob idolizing her more then I should... Goodluck. Link to comment
22n32 Posted September 13, 2011 Author Share Posted September 13, 2011 I'm falling apart today as well... I'm actually sitting here crying and shaking trying to convice myself not to call and say I love him and I want him to come back home Don't do it.. nothing good will come of it.. and just make u feel worse.. Link to comment
Imprimatur Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I agree, no good will come of your contact. You probably already let him know how you feel. He can contact you anytime he wants. Talking will only quiet your anxiety for a while, and it will become a cycle you do not want to get into. I have been NC (again lol) for 1.5 weeks. Its still hard but I have no desire to check facebook, or email her, but admit that I still open my email account and hope for an incoming email- everytime! Sometimes I wonder if reading these boards is a good idea, or if it just manages to keep it fresh in my (our) minds. I was feeling better today, but after reading all these posts, am suddenly feeling not-so-happy and contemplating that huge loss again...sigh. I will keep dating, but not in a great life position to feel proud enough or strong enough to pull it all off Link to comment
DerekJason Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 i thought i was well on my way to acceptance, yet here we are, 11 weeks after the fact, and shedding tears like an 8th grade school girl. i wish everyone here peace. Link to comment
Imprimatur Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I hear you there. I read stories about people pining for years after a relationship and can't imagine the thought. My small hope is that I have seen some progress, and can only hope for more. It can't come quick enough for me. I envy the people that get over it quickly! Link to comment
DerekJason Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I hear you there. I read stories about people pining for years after a relationship and can't imagine the thought. My small hope is that I have seen some progress, and can only hope for more. It can't come quick enough for me. I envy the people that get over it quickly! me too! i've seen huge progress, yet these last 2 days have me down and out, fantasizing about her sending me a text laced with reconciliation, suuuuuch a bummer. i cant wait till i wake one day and not be all messed up starting the second i wake up. Link to comment
RubyWoo Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Oh man it seems we're all having a hard time lately Link to comment
Imprimatur Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I have been trying to excersize more lately, this morning was the best I have had since the beginning (or the end) lol. Perhaps because I am getting more sleep! It comes and goes in waves during the day, and have to remember that as bad as it can be, it will pass and I will feel better later on. trying some techniques to put it out of my mind. I will post somewhere if any of it works. I am told that one day I will wake up, and my mind will be tired of thinking about it, and discard the whole subject. Link to comment
sadchick83 Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 22n32 and the others, be proud of your NC thus far. It's going to sting for a little while but you will feel enormously better in the weeks to come. As that gap grows between last contact and now, you will begin to feel happy again. Link to comment
sillylilgrl Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Day 1 of NC (again) I hope to be strong the nxt time she decides to contact me. I too wish I could make this hope of getting back together and working it out and just make it disappear. One day @ a time I guess Link to comment
Gaffler Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 I know how you all feel, Its been 10 days NC, and a month since she told me she found someone else. I no longer wake up with her in the front of my mind, but often still have dreams of here in some form or fashion. Nearly every night, but the last couple I haven't. During mornings though, it invariably starts messing with me, ruminating over what happened. Consciously, I've dealt with all this, and I know there is no point in recycling the details any longer. Shes gone, and I am in charge of my life, my thoughts, my feelings. I know thats all true, but I am only beginning to change a lifetime of habitually placing my emotional well-being on others. It isn't happening overnight. I've been frustrated for at least a week that thoughts of her continue to intrude. I want to be over this! I read the boards here for the healing quotes, and best of ENA is a good thread too. But I'm getting so tired... combating one's own thoughts, even if you do it as peacefully as possible, is draining. Right now I'm telling myself to take a break, go easy on myself. Just focus on relaxing... Link to comment
Imprimatur Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 Whats the best of ENA thread? Link to comment
DerekJason Posted September 13, 2011 Share Posted September 13, 2011 But I'm getting so tired... combating one's own thoughts, even if you do it as peacefully as possible, is draining. Right now I'm telling myself to take a break, go easy on myself. Just focus on relaxing... you sir, are not lying. sometimes i swear my brain is eroding. Link to comment
Sanity Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 Thinking about someone so often is tiring yet uncontrollable. I swear she pops into my mind once every few minutes. Its going to make my head implode. Link to comment
DerekJason Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 Thinking about someone so often is tiring yet uncontrollable. I swear she pops into my mind once every few minutes. Its going to make my head implode. tiring, yet you cant fall asleep? thats where im at. Link to comment
Sanity Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 tiring, yet you cant fall asleep? thats where im at. Yup. Even when I do fall asleep, I'd wake up at 4am and the first thought would be her. Sometimes I even get paranoid at the thought of what she has done with her new boyfriend. Its a vicious cycle isn't it ? Link to comment
Gaffler Posted September 14, 2011 Share Posted September 14, 2011 I've seen my ex's new guy, pfft! Not impressed. Still, she is his now. Her words. The thought of them laughing together, and mixing it with memories of our early days... I know exactly the things they're doing and its like ice inside my veins. It took about 3 weeks for those dreams to peter out, but I think the key is taking care of ourselves physically. Today I am tired from lack of food and sleep, thats gotta be part of this. Sleep, eat right, and keep moving forward... What other choice is there? We won't quit, right fellas? Link to comment
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