somegirl30 Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 I've been doing online dating. Personally, I prefer meeting sooner rather than later...within a week or 2 of starting to talk to someone. I prefer to find out if there's attraction and a connection so my time's not wasted. However I've found some of the men I talk to don't really seem to want to meet. I don't understand. A couple weeks ago I had plans to meet a man at a restaurant. I went and he didn't show. He later texted, "sorry it didn't work out." I told him to lose my number. Last weekend I was supposed to meet another man who had to cancel and is still talking to me and says he wants to meet. If we don't meet by next weekend I'm going to forget about him. Tonight I was supposed to meet someone and I sent a text to confirm and got no response. What is with these guys? If they don't want to meet why do they say they do? It's so frustrating! Has anyone else had similar experiences? Link to comment
Crazyaboutdogs Posted September 10, 2011 Share Posted September 10, 2011 There are a lot of losers on those dating sites. I can pretty well bet that the way a person treats someone from the dating site is the way they generally operate in their life. So the person who makes plans with someone on the dating site and doesn't show up, not even apologizing for not showing up is probably someone who is rude like this in his everyday dealings with people. So you are better off that you found out right away than wasting your time with someone who will turn on the charm to win you over and then start playing these rude games. Link to comment
Pkittie Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 somegirl30, I have had similar experiences with online dating. Few guys that contact me refuse to send their pic despite my request, while a lot of them are flaky when it comes to calling/meeting. I have realized that online dating can be very frustrating which is why you cannot pin your hopes high. It's good that you are seeing their true colours early on, it's very hard to find that connection & chemistry. Just keep the hope alive & you never know when & where you might meet him.... Link to comment
Iheartbacon Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 I've been doing online dating off and on for awhile, there's a lot of flaky people out there. Usually if the person has already met up with someone from online, they'll be more apt to try it again but of course that's not always the case... Link to comment
Fudgie Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Online dating, at least just having a profile and messaging people, doesn't take a lot of "people skills". I suspect that there are many people on dating sites who have anxiety about social situations and may flake out because of them. Link to comment
tmtex Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 I've been playing the onthing game since xmas. As a MALE , I dont have time to right the book of the freaky women out there. Anyway Somegirl30, I also like to meet quick, get it over with and see if there is anything. Been through the same thing with women. Link to comment
motley802 Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Online dating is no different than "offline" one. In offline there is high probability that you know person before asking them out and since you know them personally, you can judge by their body language whether they are attracted to you or not. So there its unlikely that someone is going to bail out right before date, Guys flaking our at the last moment is slightly weird. Because based on my observation, we guys have to work really hard to get girls attention on dating websites. I don't think nice guys will be doing this kind of stuff. These kind of weirdos are either interested in hookups or they are too shy to meet with you. Nice guys who are really interested in relationships will definitely come to date. Link to comment
shy2cool Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Why is it so hard to meet someone online? Link to comment
motley802 Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Why is it so hard to meet someone online? Its not that hard. Meeting right person who is genuine and not a weirdo is really hard In online world, signal to noise ratio is really low. Hence we think its really hard to meet someone online Link to comment
Oneironaut Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Online dating is no worse or better than going to a club to meet people. There are tons of weirdos and flakes there, too. Like anything else, sometimes you have to dig through a bushel of bad apples to find the good ones. I know several people who are in successful relationships as a result of an online dating site...sometimes it just takes time, patience, and a little bit of luck. Link to comment
MrZod2012 Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 I guess I am a kind of successful in online dating, but I have to tell you as a man I got sick of that. I also have my frustrations and number one is that many women are so bitter and probably disappointed that they are start treating me poorly. Then after they meet me they realize the thing is for real. One thing I learned: It is true I also like to meet people ASAP, but I read and I from my long-term experience, I learned that a bond is likely to be developed if you keep chatting for a long time. Of course you would chat only if it is a long distance relationship like mine. What pissed me off is that especially in America women make so hard to get to know them in face to face, real world activities. On the streets and public place often women smile to me and even accept my phone number, etc. But they never call me. So why is that women do not start giving a chance to meet face to face like in the old days. Online dating sucks big time. There are lot of fake people out there, yes. Link to comment
banal Posted September 11, 2011 Share Posted September 11, 2011 Why is it so hard to meet someone online? In the 'real world' you typically don't run around showcasing yourself as a profile, and dating other people you find alluring and attractive. By the time you date in person, a lot of the time you've already established that you have a connection - even if it's solely physical - to the other person. Online, it's a big gamble. With that said, and I may get flack for this, but a lot of people who date online, and who have been dating online for a while, are doing it for a reason: poor social skills, commitment problems... Link to comment
MrZod2012 Posted September 12, 2011 Share Posted September 12, 2011 Why it is so hard to date online? Simple: the most preferred people (based on looks, age, occupation, etc) are in high demand. Very likely the guy the poster tried to schedule an appointment with had received already an invitation from another women (perhaps more appealing to him) and here you go, you are left out. That is exactly how it happens. Dozens of requests every week make people really busy and it is tempting to hop from one girl to another and vice and versa. In the 'real world' you typically don't run around showcasing yourself as a profile, and dating other people you find alluring and attractive. By the time you date in person, a lot of the time you've already established that you have a connection - even if it's solely physical - to the other person. Online, it's a big gamble. With that said, and I may get flack for this, but a lot of people who date online, and who have been dating online for a while, are doing it for a reason: poor social skills, commitment problems... Link to comment
Shudder Posted October 22, 2011 Share Posted October 22, 2011 bumping this because i just came accross something that really pisses me off. when (in my case) women on there just stop talking to you for the most trivial reason ever in the entire universe! i was talking to one girl and she just stopped talking to me because i was always asking her questions. like really? no wonder you're single. people don't even try on online dating sites. its like one thing they don't like they move on to someone else, rinse repeat, and are always on the website. if at all online dating, has just made people worse at dating rather then better Link to comment
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