SillyGurl89 Posted September 9, 2011 Share Posted September 9, 2011 Boyfriend/Fiance is he selfish or am I asking too much? My boyfriend/fiance and I have been fighting alot lately. I love him and want things to work but I am wondering if I am being too demanding or if he just is not even trying. I'm 22 he is 23. We have been together for a year and 2 mos. I bring him meals I drive him around wherever he needs to go because he currently does not have a car. He has a fulltime job now which is nice. We don't live together however I stay over quite a bit. I love being with him even though he rents out a room so the room is really small and hot...but I don't mind because I love him. However, like last night we had a quickie ( which means he gets off in 5 min and thats it) I bought him beer...he was watching fb and doing his fantasy football tracker...he wnated more beer so I went to the store again and got him more. After the game he was busy still obsessing over the fb so I was reading...then when he made it clear it was time to sleep I went to get closer to him and he was all mad and put on his headphones and shut me out. I've been asking him for a week to cuddle with me and just love on me. He doesn't seem to get it. At one point the other day he said he didn't think Id stay with him if we didn't have sex, however he was the one who pressured me to have sex and initiated it in hte relationship. i wanted to wait. The sex isn't a big deal for me because this is my other issue...this morn he woke up and I was still hurt about last night however I ended up putting those emotions away like I always do...he told me if I got him off quick then hed last longer later on in hte morning for me. I spent 45 min focusing soley on him and gave him (and im judging by his reaction) a pretty sensual happy ending massage...I then asked him if he could simply massage me too...(but like he always does) he said he was tired...then he said he wasn't feeling good...then he put his hand and rubbed 3 times real quick on my leg while playing on his phone....thats it...I spent 3 hrs this morn trying to get him to pay attention to me...to even just hug me and kiss me...or return a favor. His idea of sex is 5 - 10 min.total and hten he is done. .. in 8 months of having sex...he has tried maybe 2 times to help me find my release and after 2 mins of trying both times he just gave up and said its my fault. Ive never experienced any type of release with him. And I constantly ask him and I constantly buy new lingerie...read up on different techniques and I ace it...but he doesn't put in any effort. I am constantly feeling hurt...and i don't know if I am just expecting too much. He constantly tells me he won't smoke if we go out (it bothers me when he smokes...he only does it occasionally...) and then he does...he constantly says he won't drink anymore and he always does. I have to ask him to hold my hand...I'm tired of asking the man who says he loves me...to make me feel special. Am I just being a brat? sry this is so long. I am just frustrated. Ive heard communication is key..and Ive talked to him..but he placates me and I just let it go. I have sex with him even though I get frustrated because I'm not satisfied because he cheated on me in the beginning of the relationship and I wasn't having sex with him at that time. So I feel like if I don't sleep with him...someone else might step in and meet those needs. I don't mind doing it ... I love him...but I'm very unsatisfied and getting frustrated. I'm willing to try anything. He says he loves me and that I'm "perfect". Ive asked him if I need to change anything physically...anything...but I dunno...he never says anything. Link to comment
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