i dont want to feel like this anymore!

[w3536]

Long story short. We went out for 3 yrs and then she broke it up with me almost a year ago and then came back this june. She told me she missed me and well that she was sorry and I tried to be strong and tell her that she had her chance. I did, I told her that I had to let her go and then she insisted and I fell. I started texting her and telling her that I wasn’t over “us.” She said that she was sorry for everything that she did and that now she appreciated everything that I did for her and we even had sex a couple of time in a span of 2 months. Now she says that she doesn’t even miss me or wants me.

I feel like I fool because I should’ve been strong. I should’ve said no! I should’ve stuck to my guts and believed what I knew was right and that she wouldn’t change. Now im hurt and I feel like I let my chance to be “the one who got away” go.

I feel like I fool because as I was giving her the time to move on I was only falling deeper into the hole.

Now im stuck her missing her and I wondering everything about her! I wish I could go back and tell myself not to answer her texts or calls! That it was all a game for her and that I was only going to get hurt.

DON’T ANSWER TEXT FROM EXES! It’s the past!!! Specially if they broke up with you and all they did was hurt you. You’ll be left feeling like a fool!

Now she is just up and about like nothing ever happened and I am here writing to you how I am thinking about her and missing her. Its been 2 ½ weeks since no contact and although I am fine I still think about her and there isn’t a day that goes by that I pray.

I pray to forget her. I pray that I hope nothing goes wrong in her life. That no one ever treats her the way that she treated me and that I hope she has a fulfilling life but most of all I pray for me. I pray for the day when I don’t think about her once because one time is too many. I pray for the day when I do think about her and not feel a thing. I focus on my job and other activities I have. I go to the gym, hang out with friends, go out with other girls on friend dates but at the end of the day I am still thinking about her in some way. I am moving on with my life but I still think about her.

I pray that God gives me the courage to rip her out my heart and not miss her like he gave her the strength to forget about me.

I just don’t care what happens to her, I don’t want to know. If shes happy or if shes sad I don’t care! I just want ME to get better! I don’t want to miss her anymore! I don’t want to think about her anymore! I don’t want to tell everyone that im doing good and know that inside there is still a part of me that is sad because she didn’t want to be with me anymore!

Please help…

[JB007]

Man to man, all I can really say is hang in there. I could tell that you genuinley have a good heart. You still pray for this girls happiness and well being after she caused you all the pain. That alone is a form of self sacrifice. As a person you deserve better, and you will get it, but in due time.

 

I have learned a lot from reading other peoples experiance in here. One thing I learned is that you have to completely heal from the past. You have to be 100% cleansed from the old feelings you had for your ex until you are ready for any type of contact. Free from the past so that when that conatct does happen, whatever the results, it won't phase you at all......

 

Thanks for sharing W3536.

[O-shen]

I Feel your pain man. Exactly. To be treated poorly, dumped, try to be strong, then give in to the crumbs and get intimate again. It brings all the feelings back. Thinking of them all the time. Everything reminds you of them.When the couldnt give a rats about you.

 

Where was your post 5 weeks ago man? lol, i could have used it then!

 

As hard as it is, you just gotta let it go. I have been working hard on thinking of the positives in my life, what i learnt and to accept how things are. But i cannot rid my mind of her.

 

Time heals all.