woebegone Posted September 8, 2011 Share Posted September 8, 2011 Hey all, something is bothering me. My boyfriend (of ~7 years) and I are in grad school. I go over to his house on weekends because it is the only time we have to spend together these days. He lives in a house owned by his parents who are not there most of the year. Anyway, I'm finding a trend of these things happening: 1. I do dishes and laundry for him, which he lets pile up over the week. I don't mind this too much, except I feel like I am kind of expected to do these things. He does most of the cooking, so I should do the dishes, etc.. 2. I get scolded for leaving my packed weekend bag in the "way". Sometimes I leave a few articles of clothing laying around. No big deal, right? He does this too with his clothing, but it irks him like crazy when I do this. So basically I feel like a mixture of a housemate ("share the chores with me") and houseguest (expected to keep my things out of his way). I pretty much said, look, it can be one way or the other. If I am a HOUSEMATE to you, then helping you with dishes and laundry won't be a problem. However since we are sharing a space together, I should be able to put my things where I want to within reason. If I am a HOUSEGUEST to you, I shouldn't be expected to do your house's chores, but I will be more courteous with where I put my things and how I use your things. He picked Option B, houseguest, which I am OK with, I guess. As long as it's one or the other... Still frustrated and not sure how else to approach this topic. Can anyone offer some insight? Thanks so much, woe Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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