How do I handle a friend being mad at me?

[AdrianaRob]

When friends get mad at me i dont know how to handle it or I feel guilty even if its not my fault and I need to realize not everyones gunna be happy with me all the time. And everytime I get mad I say its okay when it really isnt okay cause if i say something i think Im going to lose another friend and I think thats why I never have a good friend. So today my friend had a hang over at school and I didnt know it until another friend of ours came in the room and told me that she was hung over and she'll probably be a little late. A boy over heard our friend telling me and started to laugh and went up to her and said something (idk what) and I called her name a couple times as well as our friend cause we wanted to ask her something but she just ignored us and it was lunch time and me and our friend went to our hang out spot and we tried talking to her but she just ignored us and another friend came in the room and talked to her. I know I had nothing to do with that but why is she mad at me? I also saw her talking to our friend on fb like everything is fine but yet shes still mad at me? It makes me mad cause shes mad at something so stupid. I remember when we were better friends and she used to tell me that she was mad at her other 2 friends and i used to comfort her. Idk I think its a little unreasonable.

[turnera]

The boy probably told her you were making fun of her. I will tell you that most differences happen because of miscommunication. Also, most differences can be fixed with an apology.

 

As for not standing up for yourself, try to ask yourself if you really want a friend who will ditch you just because you disagree with them. That's not much of a friend, is it?

 

One thing you might want to do is do some research about self esteem. Once you work on yours and learn to like yourself better, you'll start to see that YOU have a lot to offer other people, so approach them that way.

[AdrianaRob]

The thing is I did not say one word for the boy to say I made fun of her but anyways that was very helpful. Im starting to see that my low self esteem ruins a lot for me. Thanks!

[turnera]

You should know it doesn't matter what you really said. All that matters is what THEY hear. But you can't control any of that. That's why just being ok in your own skin is all you should strive for.

 

And here's a tip: The more self-assured YOU are, the more attractive you look and the more people want to be YOUR friend.

[AdrianaRob]

That does make sense cause sometimes i notice the unattractive girls have all the confidence of the world and have the good looking boyfriends but I am honestly more attractive and attractive guys dont even see me? Probably cause im shy and unconfident.

[turnera]

Exactly. What IS there about you that's amazing? Smart? Intuitive? Athletic? Inquisitive? Better friend than most? Good secret keeper? Logical? A guy's girl?

 

Whatever you like about yourself, focus on that. Find ways to make these things stand out. Go to your school counselor and ask for help in doing that.

[AdrianaRob]

Thanks!