Odd situation

[NCforME]

So I'm on link removed. I see this girl on there and she is very cute. But something about her seems familiar like I've seen her before. I thought maybe I've seen her out at bars before around town. Then the next day I write on a friends wall about something and I see these new pictures that were tagged of my friend with this girl from match and I recognize her. Then later in the day we are invited to the same party by another mutual friend. It turns out we somehow run in the same group but have never met that I know of.

 

The thing is how we know all the same people is that she is that mutual friends whose wall I was writing on friend from home and moved to our city a year ago. Now this mutual friend is also best friends with my ex. The one that brought me to ENA. I'm over her, she is seeing someone else. But my ex also knows her but not that well I think. They are not best friends or anything but they are FB friends.

 

So my question is should I message this girl and say "I couldn't help but recognize you from FB" and see if it goes anywhere?

[NCforME]

She seems like my type.....

[donpeel83]

What have you got to lose/? Though I wouldnt use the message you mentioned......sounds slightly stalkerish. Or hows about you message her through facebook instead??

[NCforME]

Yeah... That's my thing on this one. I'm not sure there is any really way to not come off stalkerish. Maybe I should just wait it out. Good chance since we have a good mutual friend we'll run into each other. I just don't know if there is a great way to approach emailing her. I mean the fact that we have a good mutual friend probably means we would get along better.

 

Plus I wonder if she would feel weird knowing my ex.

[EmmaB78]

Can you ask the mutual friend to set something up casually and just "happen" to invite her a long? This could be a really cute story down the line, btw. : )

[NCforME]

Can you ask the mutual friend to set something up casually and just "happen" to invite her a long? This could be a really cute story down the line, btw. : )

 

Haha... It's one of those stories that ends up cute or creepy. That's why I want to handle it with care. But, you are right. I think I will mention something to my friend this weekend if I see her.

 

Do you think just emailing her on match would come off as creepy? I was thinking something as simple as "Don't you know _____ ?" But I think I might go the route of asking my friend "who that girl was in her pictures first". Maybe that will get something started.

[NCforME]

Would a girl who casually knows my ex consider dating me? Or would that be a big turn off?

[EmmaB78]

I don't think it's creepy, but if you're worried about it, maybe just wait it out.

 

Also, it really depends on how good of friends she is with your ex. If it's just a friend of a friend thing, I wouldn't worry. If they talk on a regular basis, yeah, it's not going to happen. But there's no way for you to know this until you meet her (and DEFINITELY don't bring it up!), and either way, you wouldn't look like a jerk for asking her out so long as they aren't best pals. Worst that would happen is her saying, "Oh, I'd love to, but I just think it might be weird for X."

[NCforME]

I don't think it's creepy, but if you're worried about it, maybe just wait it out.

 

Also, it really depends on how good of friends she is with your ex. If it's just a friend of a friend thing, I wouldn't worry. If they talk on a regular basis, yeah, it's not going to happen. But there's no way for you to know this until you meet her (and DEFINITELY don't bring it up!), and either way, you wouldn't look like a jerk for asking her out so long as they aren't best pals. Worst that would happen is her saying, "Oh, I'd love to, but I just think it might be weird for X."

 

Yeah they are more just friend of a friend type. They are not texting and go out to lunch type friends. Our mutual friend is that kind of friend to my ex though. But they probably see each semi-regularly through our mutual friend but I know they don't hang out on any sort of personal level. I think I'll send a message.

 

Do you think the short and sweet "Don't you know ____? " is good enough. That way I don't really mention how I've recognized her. Even though I've definitely always wondered who that girl was when she popped up occasionally on my friends FB page.

[NCforME]

Any suggestions on a specific message to write?

[EmmaB78]

How about something like, "Is there any chance you're friends with X? I feel like I recognize you from somewhere, but I'm not sure. I'm Y, by the way."