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Friends, People and Expectations


wlh22

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So, I have had this thought on my mind for a while now and have had a tough time even articulating it. It is almost like a child crying without being able to explain the reason. Tonight I decided to pen my thoughts down. My question basically is - what do you do when you start feeling like you are always the one trying to reach out to people , friends etc.?

I always feel I call people, try to meet with them, ask how they are doing but seldom I get the same treatment (and that has been bothering me a lot). If I don't call someone for days, they never call me. But I honestly do feel that I do my part in friendships. After a while as it starts bothering me, I sort of let go.

I wish I could articulate this better but it is almost as if I feel no one cares about me (beside my parents - which I totally understand is a whole different relationship).

What should I do? How should I let go? What do you do if you feel the same way? Any thoughts are welcome.

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wlh22 I know EXACTLY what you mean!

 

I've been thinking about this alot lately too. I'm not contacted, asked to hang out or invited somewhere ever! Infact, I think if I ever stopped contacting people I'd never speak to most of my friends again. I'm a bit disillusioned with it at the moment. It sucks to feel like I'm the only one who is putting in the effort here. You do start to question "are these people really my friends?" I mean, friendships are a mutual thing right?

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I sometimes feel like this. My situation may be different as I've moved twice in 5yrs. I haven't had a cell phone in 9mo and I feel like if I were to disappear no one would even know where to find me! It has also made me disillusioned and I wonder at times if maybe I should completely cut "contact", then I realize I'm just as bad, since I rarely call people . There are people who just aren't good at maintaining a friendship and I'm one of them.I do try though. After a run in with my first clingy friend who would call me all the time and want to do things to the point where I ignored her (not the adult thing to do) I had to tell new people that I'm not the type to call you, want to hang out all the time person and we do exist. I can't imagine what it'd be like if we were in close proximity and my friends ignored me. I think I would let it go a few times and if it continues I would stop the effort. Of course communicating with your friends about how you feel might also be good. since they might not realize.

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