Can she be trusted?

[kevin nash]

Hi I posted on here a couple of months back about a girl i was seeing for a couple of weeks slepping with somone on a drunken night, After the advice giving on this forum i decided to give her another chance to see if things could work out, and iam really pleased i did as we have a really good relationship and I have never been happier with a girl. But over the past few weeks i have started to doubt weather i can actually trust her.

 

When we decided to give it another shot she said she wouldent go out for a while as what happened really affected her in a bad way and she just didnt feel like it, but now she has started to go out again iam having my doubts as Ive learnt that she;s been bumping into the lad she slept with when she's been out and not telling me, and even accepted him on facebook. I confronted her over this, to which she said for the sake of her friends being comfortable when there out together they decided to be civil to each other, to which i replied if you feel the need to be civil to him and have him on facebook then its over. She agreed she was in the wrong and deleated him from facebook, but again that whole situation has now planted the seed of doubt.

 

She is currently away at Leeds festival with a big group of friends and she texts me regulary, i asked her what she done last night to which she said me and Mike just went out raving and stayed up all night drinking. I dont know who this Mike is but the fact she has stayed up all night with a lad is making me think something might of gone on. Two questions here, am I being paranoid and can this girl be trusted?

[banal]

I don't think you're being paranoid because she's already cheated on you and she's lapsing right back into the lifestyle that had (presumably) contributed to her act of infidelity. She's probably young, as are you, so it's not like he's going to stop going out raving and partying. This sounds like nothing but a major source of anxiety for you in the future.

[kevin nash]

Thanks, when we got back together, there was an agreement that she needed to calm her ways down if i was going to trust her, and for the first month she did just that. I dont believe that she has cheated on me or will cheat on me again its the matter of respect for this relationship she dosent seem to have. For example instead of going to bed like evryone else she decides to go out with this Mike guy.Her first relationship ended due to her not caring enough about the relationship, and I feel the same thing is happening here.

[banal]

She doesn't sound like she's interested in a relationship. Maybe she likes the idea of having a boyfriend, but she's not willing to put the work in to keep one.

[kevin nash]

She doesn't sound like she's interested in a relationship. Maybe she likes the idea of having a boyfriend, but she's not willing to put the work in to keep one.

 

I thought she was up until about 2 weeks ago, am going to lay everything down when i see her, as the fact that i have been reluctant to confront her about things has caused most of the problems. I just think that she dosent know how to act in a serious relationship, the last one she had was when she was 16, she's 18 now and am 20 and I feel to much for her just to let her go, and I know she feels the same. She's coming out with me and my family for my birthday which is a step, but I feel she does need to do more to show me that she actually wants to have a proper relationship with me.