Can distant relationships work?

[Shorty389]

so i met this guy and we have only really hung out once since he lives about an hour, a little more with traffic from me, mainly y we stopped talking because i wasn't sure if i could do the distance. but i realized after a while that its not so bad like 3 or 4 hrs away, just an hour. plus he lives near my grandparents summer house (good during the summertime and his aunt lives in my town) so when he visits her we could hang out also. but i do like the "oh hey what ru doing..nothing...ok come over" when its like 9 10 at night and nothing to do hang out/stay the night type thing. with that its a little harder since he lives a little farther away, but then again if we do go into a relationship, he could spend the weekend here i could spend the weekend there etc. we get along so well when we are talking and he has a way of calming me down when i get into a bad mood or somethings wrong he can always make me feel better just by a simple phone call or text. he works all during the week and im going to be starting classes so there really is no way for us to be together during the week, but he has said he would take off work a day to see me but i feel bad since we are just friends, i'd feel bad if he took off work just to spend a day with me lol. anyway, my question is what do you think is distance? an hour, 2 hrs/3 hrs away? and have you been in a distance relationship and has it worked for you? Thanks

[mybunnyslipperz]

Long distance relationships are difficult... but do-able, if you're both willing to put the effort into it. When I first started dating my Ex, I was in school in Rhode Island and he lived in New York City. Because of the 2 1/2 hour drive to see each other, we'd only see each other on weekends. After school, I moved back home to New Jersey - he was stiill in NYC... Depending upon traffic/weather, etc... it could take longer to drive to each other's houses than it did when I was living in Rhode Island. Somehow we made it work... and ended up being together for 8 years (of course we lived together for the last half of our relationship). An hour's drive really isn't that bad... especially when you have something great to look forward to at the end of the trip! The only real downfall is that you can't really do any of those spontaneous "I'm bored... come over" things.

 

Good luck to you! I hope it works out!

[Shorty389]

yeah, my ex lived 5 minutes away from me, it wasnt a long relationship but i liked the idea of hey come over and he was over within 5 min. but like you said if we are both willing to work it out, which since he said he would take off work for a day to see me obviously he wants it to work also. so hopefully it can turn into something, thanks, hope everything worked out for you to

[superfox]

Mine is an hour away and we've made it work. It's not too far IMO, heck I even managed a day trip over and back one day last week, to look at a house with him

 

Good luck!

[Stay_home]

Long distance relationships have never worked out for me and I believe that's because I've never been optimisitic about them in the first place. They can work, but like anything they require a lot of work in order for it to be successful.

[Shorty389]

thanks everyone

[Tigerfan]

I have had two LDR in the past 3 years. The first one she was 1 1/2 hours away. We broke up, but because of the distance. The second one lived 2 hours away. We have dated 13 months and broke up TODAY . The distance may have caused some problems with this one but the main reason was we just weren't as compatible as we wanted to be. The distance definitely makes it tougher. I mainly saw these women on the weekends only.

[Shorty389]

I have had two LDR in the past 3 years. The first one she was 1 1/2 hours away. We broke up, but because of the distance. The second one lived 2 hours away. We have dated 13 months and broke up TODAY . The distance may have caused some problems with this one but the main reason was we just weren't as compatible as we wanted to be. The distance definitely makes it tougher. I mainly saw these women on the weekends only.

 

sorry to hear about the break up ive never done a distance relationship, i sort of see it as if i do end up with him, sometimes people do say its not always the best thing seeing your bf/gf 24/7, always being with them whatnot. i've been hurt before a few times and i just dont want to go down that road again so i don't want the distance being the problem..he seems to think it wont be a problem so hopefully it will work out, we are planning to hang out next weekend so i guess we will see how it plays out then