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My obsession over guys obsessed over me.


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I am single and not looking. I am not going to lie or act like i dont like guys going after me or head over heels for me, I enjoy those very much. I am at the point where i can get whatever i want as long as i mention my wish to them and ask nicely. Although i don't accept their invitation on "dates" or "outings" all the time, they never give up on asking me out. No matter how many times i remind them that im not in for any close relationships, they still appear with anything i want. Now, it's not that i am using them or want to fool around with them. My life is quite stable in terms of work, friends and family and fun. I can live without men. But seems like this whatever 'obsession' of mine is beginning to be obvious to my close friends and family. I dont know what obsession this is... Guys' constant comings are like my drug...And they seem to be willing to get 'hurt' from me. I am not looking for a relationship. Actually, one of the guys i am dating is giving me a hard time (but he gives one of the best times) to pull myself out of this as im very sure im not interested in a relationship. He calls me a succubus, which i dont mind being labeled as one. But i tend to wonder if it is bad.... I know it IS bad to fool around with hearts, and really i have no intention of sucking anybody's soul or something like that. I do disappear myself, like lying to them that im not free when they ask of me. Or pop myself a pill to go to sleep so that i get rest from replying their texts and messages. Sometimes i am afraid....Either afraid they are stupid to want to get to know a girl like me n they get hurt. or afraid of guys who can put on a mask like them pretending to give their all to women. Complicated, you can shake me all you want and ask me what do i really want, and i still cant really tell. All i could answer is I want NO CLOSE RELATIONSHIP with anyone.

Do i have to kill this whatever obsession i have? Or shall i just continue whatever im doing and enjoy the ride?

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Sometimes I feel that its hard for me to stick to one guy because I like guys coming after me and asking me out. So i know how you feel.


I am hanging out with two guys right now who are friends and I am having some difficulties because I made out with his friend. It felt nice, but a part of me wished I hadn't made out with him. Now I cannot hang out with the other guy because of what I have done, but I feel like done nothing wrong because the guy never takes initiation to ask me out or suggest anything. he didn't even protect me when guys were on my shoulder while his friend (the guy I made out with) protect me and flirted with me and I liked it.


But let me tell you, the less guys you have on your shoulder, the better. I'm just sticking to two guys at the moment and I am not adding a third guy on to the list because I don't want them to fall for me and I can't choose or end up hurting them.


Last time I dated this guy for like 5 months and I was well committed not to date anyone but he wasn't. When people asked me out on the dating site I refused because I didn't want them falling for me like I said. And also because it's hard to go out with a guy online. Anyways I end up hanging out with a 2 guys friends. I think I gave the wrong signal to one of guy and he was creeping me out. But he treated me very nice and that's why I went out with him. He thought that


Well anyways my advice to you is that you need to stop going out with so many guys and try to control yourself. DO not send them mix signals and just say you're not interested in them instead of saying not wanting a close relationship. They probably think that they might still have a chance. But I know its hard to reject them in there face. I am just like you, I got guys coming after me left to right and some are guy friends...

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You say you are not using them but you absolutely are using them. You are using them to boost your own ego and it needs to stop. You are giving them just enough signals to think that they have a chance with you. Though I would say that those guys are really foolish and perhaps deserving of that because they have NO self respect. While those guys are dense and don't have a clue on how to get a girl, it still needs to stop because you are not only hurting them but yourself too. It shows that you may have some confidence issues or something a long the line because you need to be appreciated and treated like a goddess. If a time ever comes(like when you age and the gift of youth passes) and guys stop showering you with attention you will feel like crap because you are no longer getting validation from men.


I won't lie to you but what you are doing is a bad thing and it will come to a point where you will meet a guy who has a clue and you will fall for him because he is different and you are going to do the same exact thing as the chumps who like you and he is going to dismiss you as easily as you dismiss those chumps who shower you with gifts. It's not going to feel good. I've seen it before and it is probably going to happen to you if you continue this sick course.

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Nah, you don't have to kill it, but the way I feel right now, you just need to run into someone like you. It would cure your obsession. Someone to treat you like a puppy on a leash. And you would so be up for the challenge cause you can't help yourself. And chances are you probably will meet your match, just give it a little while longer.


That's basically what you need. A guy to beat you at your own game and not give a damn that he's toying with you. Then you'll be bawling for months about how "screwed up" you are and forgiving all kinds of hideous acts on his part because you will feel like you "deserve it". Karma will catch up and someone else is going to feel really great doing that to you and you WILL "love" him for it. Are you ready to pay it back?

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