Unmotivated to finish Undergrad. I need advice

[Leona700]

Ever since my third year in college every quarter I either do very good or very bad. Last year was my fourth year which im finishing this year as well. I had two incomplete grades in which one will turn into an F very soon because i didnt finish the assignments required. I dont know i tell myself im going to do it, I tell my professors Ill come thru and then I dont. I used to love school learning, reading writting, and now it just feels like an obligation. Last year i found myself in love with an abuser..The relationship ended at the end of the year. This summer i took time to reflect and reolized that ppl have really harmed me maybe because I allowed it or maybe because i didnt know any better. Any input would greatly be appriciated.

[Leona700]

One more thing Im having trouble making eye contact and for some reason I feel uncomfterble around most people at times including my family which is odd..

[bulletproof]

What is your major? Is it something you're interested in?

[Leona700]

International Relations I am interested in the major but I just feel out of energy.

[Angel Irulan]

Are you at UVA? My alma mater! We always referred to our years as first, second, third, etc. Not like everyone else who gets Fresh, Soph, Junior. I graduated ooohhh so long ago!

 

Okay, so go to your student health and tell them every bit of this! Do it Monday if you are on Grounds/Campus. It's hard to get an appointment. For your studies. Take a clear assessment of what you need to a library and just sit and do it. Every bit. Leave for lunch and dinner. Don't quit.

 

BTW, UVA'ers typically have a fourth year fling. Mostly they don't last. If yours was abusive, be grateful it's over.

 

 

Angel

[Jetta]

The only advice I have is that you try to focus on completing the requirements, you won't regret doing so. But you will regret allowing this abuser as you called him to derail your life.

[meoww]

As someone who understands all too well what you went through...please don't become short sighted and lose track of your long term goals. Undergrad can be a bit tedious but it's only the beginning of a very long career and life. If you aren't enjoying your life right now, there are so many new things you can try.

 

Don't be too hard on yourself if you are feeling burnt out!! The key is to take things slow and steady, especially since you seem to be a bit depressed. By slow and steady, I mean it could be years until you feel sure of yourself and are finding fulfilling work.

 

What you need is a real goal, or a series of real goals--both long and short term. Goals that really motivate you and get you out of bed in the morning and goals that give you meaning. I lost sight of my own path and was distracted by a series of bad relationships, and I'm still kicking myself for my mistakes. Don't let this happen to you. You are very young and it's a very opportune time to become an independent thinker and trust your instincts.

 

It may feel good to discontinue your education now, but what's waiting on the other side? You have to be really motivated and bright to create a life for yourself without an education. Perhaps you are one of those people, but most of us need to learn from our peers, professors, and receive guidance along the way. You might not feel up for it but work experience in the form of an internship or paid position may really give you some insight into your lifestyle post college.