First post here, want to heal but still have hope

[fullofregret]

I definitely need to 'heal'! Ok, I'm resolved to keep to NIC, am keeping busy, have so much stuff planned, there is a possibility of collapsing!

I still have hope - I can't help that, but trying to focus on me and the reasons I don't want to allow this to dictate my life in the way it has been recently.

I am not sleeping v well and feel tearful. I keep telling myself this will pass, and some days are better than others.

 

The last text I received was

'I am sad we didn't work out, you are the love of my life, you are a good loving generous person and I hope you find someone who appreciates you'

 

He has indicated that he would like contact obce the dust has settled

 

I've been posting on the getting back together board so far. Despite my heart telling me that I know him better than anyone else, and recalling previous convs constantly, I have to accept his decision.

[fullofregret]

If it's meant to be, it will be. I've been reading LOA posts, nonchalance and NC posts... I am upset, but can't help thinking that things may change. His mum has told me that he loves me. This is reassuring, however I know that means v little if he doesn't act on his feelings. I've done the asking, pleading, letter approach - hasn't worked.

[MasterPo]

First off, I'm sorry you are going through the pain. It will pass I promise that much, it passed for me and I was so sure that I would grieve forever.

 

Lots of advice on here. Read it. Sort through it. Read it again. Each month the advice has new meaning. I have a damn book of print-outs and yeah, it helped.

 

I promote exercise. Endorphins kill love cells is my big saying. Walk a few miles every day and let the pain fall off like the sweat, drop by drop. Ice cream works too, just make sure you walk twice a day. Mention Butter Pecan and watch me light up. Anyway, it works. Not a fan of chocolate but when in Rome. Eat some and see if helps. Sleep and remember you don't chase the semi that just hit you.

 

Good luck.

[Carus]

It's the hardest and most painful thing I know...

 

But it looks like you may be moving out of the Denial stage into Acceptance....This is good and takes time...

Some live in denial for years....One year for me!

 

Once you've gotten comfortable in acceptance, you start making your way towards indifference and then finally back out in the sun again....

 

The Acceptance stage brings with it a peacefulness...which, despite still feeling sad and teary, is so much better than the confusion that is felt in those initial stages!

 

I've followed you for a while Full* and you really are doing the best you can....Very proud of You*

 

((Hugs))

 

Ever Forward

Carus* 8-)

[fullofregret]

Ok, I have got through the day, have even laughed with friends, had a really nice evening. I'm on the internet, and have a randon friend request from a name I don't know with a picture of a white bear holding a love heart saying 'I love you'.... There are no mutual friends, and I have ignored the request, neither confirming nor denying it. (To give a little background, earlier today when I signed onto my facebook and notice that ex's new partner has unblocked me on fb today because I could see her picture again in my messages inbox - long story, she contacted me last week after opening letter I sent him.... my prev posts refer. Strangely she has disappeared again and now I have this random request.

Do you think my 'friend' is playing games? Or am I just reading too much into it?

[Carus]

You are reading too much into it.....Think about something else...

Go outside and breathe the air*

 

Sending you strength

Carus* 8-)