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so now a pack of idiots want to jump me....


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so I just found out a group of wanna-be korean gangsters (most just petty drug dealers) want to jump me for the sake of their friend we'll call K. K and I have been friends since highschool in a very tight knit group of guys. but after graduation I drifted away from K. I was growing up and wanting to be social and active and was also very serious about college. K stayed the same as he was in highschool except he started gambling and went through periods of drug dealing. he was a complete knucklehead and I cringed when he was around, but for the sake of our group of friends I was always nice to him.


I had feelings for T while she dated K but for the majority of our friendship never acted on them. I had a feeling she liked me too due to the intimacy of our friendship. we really leaned on each other; always being understanding and always available. one day about six months after her and K broke up we slept together when we were both extremely drunk. back then I had a deathly fear of commitment and of the intensity of my feelings for her so I made it seem like it was a drunken mistake and we remained friends. she was crushed and a few days later told me she had had feelings for me for a long time. I still denied having feelings and we stayed friends.


Then a few months later I realized how stupid that was. Why was I chasing meaningless flings with random girls when I had this beautiful and loving person who just wanted to be there for me. still too much of a coward to tell her how I really felt I did confess having a crush and we began to date casually.


eventually K caught on and confronted her about it. she did not want to lie when he asked if we had slept together so she told him the truth. this is when he went off the deep end. and for the record let me say that the year that they were broken up they did not have even the resemblance of a friendship.


he thought I had betrayed him and that I had no right to date her. he began telling her that I was a horrible person and that she was stupid not to see it. he also told her and several others that I was merely using her for sex. she defended me through all their conversations but his reaction to finding out along with the other "friends" in our once tight knit group put a serious strain on her and I's budding relationship/


K could not understand that she was by far my closest friend. I tried explaining that I was not willing to hinder the natural progression of my closest relationship with someone for the sake of someone I'm not that close towards. I always knew he liked me more than the other way around and it upsets me that he had to find out but it is what it is.


everyone else in the group of friends has taken K's side. someone who has been my friend for 11 years, someone who's family considers me a son, ended his friendship with me over this. only a couple have remained neutral. one of the friends who we will call J has been making the situation much worse. after K found out we had sex recently he let him know that we had sex six months back. he also told K that we were hooking up in Ts car when he was at the party inside. (a stupid thing to do I know, but for those who have been in the heat of the moment know that logic escapes you)


J recently told me today at work that some of Ks friends wanted to jump me. in his defense he did stop them. but I am still enraged because I cannot even imagine what it is that he is telling people that would make them want to jump a complete stranger. many do not agree with me but I've always viewed jumping as a threat against ones life. 5 or 6 grown men beating one person with all the adrenaline and mob mentality and who knows what could happen. I always care a pretty big knife on me (I work in a lumber yard and use it to cut twine etc.) but I'm going to tell K if any of his friends tries to jump me I will kill one of them in self defense.


Am I wrong for pursuing T? does the bro code apply to male friends who you could do without? what can I possibly do to diffuse this situation? K hates me now and honestly I have nothing to apologize to him about. I've already lost several friends, or atleast, people who I thought were my friends. now I just want the dust to settle.

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I left out the back story for T so the thread may be confusing (cant edit OP?). I've known T for as long as I've known K and she's my best friend. I used to be very selfish and I wouldnt always treat her well but she's always called me out on it and stood by me. I've never met someone with a bigger heart. And I guess thats what K can't get is that her friendship with me absolutely dwarfed his with me in every way.

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