SilverMoon Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 Well, not me. It's been 4 1/2 months now of pain and heartache and my mind has been so messed up i can't even remember what it was like to be with him or what's happened over that time. But, today sealed the deal of no going back. He leaves to go back to australia in 3 weeks and he asked me to come on one last holiday with him to amsterdam which i agreed to after a lot of tooing and froing. He stayed thurs nite, we went to the movies fri nite and saw each other yesterday. But today, it all came to me, it hit me in the head actually. His sister and soon to be brother in law are here from australia and he wanted me to spend the day with them which i did. around me, he will hold me and even kiss me but today, he would only be affectionate when noone else was around, he's cool with that, 'everyone knows we're still friends'. so i had to see this couple, so happy and in love and engaged, and play nice and be sociable and watch him get so drunk and feel like i was absolutely nothing. he didn't even say goodbye to me tonite when he left. all day, talking about their wedding plans and him smiling and it's all so cool we're friends. i just wanted to scream, i'm not your friend and tell his sister all the bad things he has done. part of me thought she might want to talk to me about it. but nothing. just empty, hollow. nothing. i hate him. i actually hate him. i put myself through pain today for him. i'm so stupid. Link to comment
Mellie Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 Was he affectionate around other people before? I ask, because I'm not. I actually don't like it so much (I am such a prude!) - it just makes me shy - especially in front of my family *shudder*. Not saying goodbye is BS though. How wasted was he exactly? Doesn't sound like he handled himself well. Link to comment
SilverMoon Posted July 10, 2011 Author Share Posted July 10, 2011 Always. Now we've broken up, he is but it's all secretive. Yes, it was BS but he was very drunk. That's kinda sealed the deal too. I'm not going to be with a selfish alcoholic anymore. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 The first step to healing is recognizing that the relationship is over. This is good. Link to comment
Mellie Posted July 10, 2011 Share Posted July 10, 2011 If he's going back to Australia in 3 weeks anyway... Yeah, that is * * * * ty. I hate the way people can be so calculated and logical about things - "one last holiday" and all I think I'd have fallen the pieces. I would've got my hopes up for sure. On the flip side, getting hammered might indicate he wasn't dealing with the situation particularly well himself. Link to comment
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