I'm Needing Help!!!

[JTP]

I am 25 days away from being 14 and I've been going out with my girlfriend for 1 month and 8 days but before that i went out with her for 4 months.

We are quite close and i'm thinking of asking her if she wants to take our relationship to the next level.

Is that a good idea or not.

[dramallama]

What do you mean by taking your relationship to the next level? Do you mean having sex?

 

If so, 13 (and 14 and 15) is just a baby. I know that you don't like hearing that, but when you get older, you will understand what I mean. Having sex is a BIG responsibility. It's not just about having fun and doing what feels good. What would you do if your girlfriend go pregnant? Are you prepared to be a dad? Have you two discussed birth control? Do you even know the difference between barrier and hormonal birth control? Have you two been tested for STDs and AIDS? What happens if she gets attached to you? How long do you see yourself with her? What would you do if she got pregnant?

 

So that is a lot to think about and I haven't even covered everything. You are way too young IMO, and you've only known her for a month, which is almost a stranger. Wait a good few years.

[JTP]

I meant fingering im not prepeard to go as far as sex and ive known her for about 3 and a half years

[mouseno4]

If you take any advice - any at all - you need to TAKE.THINGS.SLOW and i mean damn slow. Only do what she will allow you to do.

 

(to be quite honest i am not 100% on the old doing this kind of thing before even 16/17 years)

[jaywalk]

Your definition of "the next level" is sex.. period. There seems to be a disconnect for the younger generation that doesnt see that (thank you bill clinton) and there needs to be some serious reflection on your part. Dramallama says it well, sex is a big responsibility. A person of your age is not mentally or emotionally prepared to handle the gravity of this yet. I know you want to be seen as the "big man on campus" or at the very least seen as keeping up with the rest of the guys, but know this; your girlfriend will be just fine knowing that you want her just like she is without the sexual component. She is (at this point in her life) needing to feel loved or appreciated by someone other than her family and if sexual contact is what it takes, she is likely to go through with it.

So begs the question; do you love or appreciate her enough without getting physical? Better yet, do you RESPECT her enough without getting physical?

 

You have the rest of your life to experience sex, so it would be best if you wait till you're older.

[lizzie2011]

Are you ready for the next level? How educated are you about it? There are implications for sexual relations that can be with you all your life. I am talking about STD's and babies. In addition to that there are emotional consequences of sex. It is going to change your relationship with her. Are you ready to deal with all of that?