An interesting twist in my breakup.... completely confused

[wingsoflead]

I've made a couple threads already detailing my trial and tribulations regarding my breakup. We lived in two different states a little over an hour from each other and dated for over 2 years. It's been over seven months since she left me for her ex boyfriend. She made a few vain efforts to talk to me and stay friends, but I have been strictly no contact for 6 months.

 

At first I struggled mightily over the situation and had a tough time realizing what exactly happened and coming to grips with the fact that I couldn't fix this. After a few months I made some huge life changes and got a great new job which is ironically very close to where she lives now. I have not seen or spoken to her...but the other day I received a very strange piece of information from a friend.

 

Someone I know who dabbles in online dating sites just so happened to find her profile up, with multiple pictures and a full profile. Now the shocking thing was she gave up our two year relationship for her ex who was supposed to be the love of her life, and now she's had to resort to using dating sites. The whole thing is just entirely confusing. I feel like if she ever found out I knew she would be extremely embarrassed. And another part of me wonders why she is even on there in the first place. This girl looks like a legit model and really wouldn't need this. I have no clue if she is still with him or if she is just messing around on the site. Basically it has shaken my 6 months of NC and made me extremely curious on whether it would be wise to contact her or not. Also a part of me wonders why she hasn't tried to talk to me....Even though I was pretty much the one who told her I didn't want to talk anymore.

 

It's just a very strange situation and I'm really not sure what to do.

[bichin]

Maybe someone put up a fake profile with her picture. it happens.

[wingsoflead]

No way...this thing is as legit as it gets

[bichin]

If this isn't correct please say so. She dumped you and you went no contact. She also went no contact. Now you are wondering about her and thinking of making contact.

[wingsoflead]

The whole situation pretty much made me want to reach out to her and see how she's doing basically.

[bichin]

You could try but she may not answer with anything you want to hear or anything at all for that matter.

[deavyin]

Leave it be man. Seeing her profile has already shaken up your 6 months NC. You don't want to have to start over from scratch when you've made it this far. You don't know why she put that profile up and it's best to keep it that way. You might hear that her and the ex broke up and she is all miserable and having a hard time. You might also hear that she has it up just to make new friends or because she likes the site or enjoys the male attention and is still with the ex.

 

Either way, nothing you hear from her is going to give you closure or make you feel better about the way things ended. I have been left for another guy twice. Once 4 years ago and once 2.5 months ago. It sucks and it's the worst way to go out but you can't expect them to make it any easier. The only thing they can do is make it much worse. Man, I wish I had 6 months NC under my belt. You are doing so well right now it would be best not to F it up. Just forget about the profile and go on with your life.

[wingsoflead]

Thank you deavyin, hearing it that way really puts things into perspective. I guess this whole incident really made me reconsider the entire no contact process. I'm really not sure how much I gained out of it. I know eventually I would like to talk to her again, but I'm just not sure how or when. At this point I'm not really concerned about the duration of the NC period we had already. I'm not sure it would really have that much of an impact on me either way if I broke it. It's something that I am heavily debating on now.