Too dependent on the Internet

[mouseno4]

Are we becoming too dependent on the Internet where we cant make a decision on our relationships until we have consulted a pre-written "experts guide" on the other gender?

 

Live forums are fine as the more information you provide, the better advice you receive. But do a google search for some random relationship topic and such as "why doesnt he call" or "why does she cheat" and you get a whole lot of topics where people in your position ask online for advice. The trouble is, after reading that you take the answer as valid for your OWN problem.

 

The kicker here is that what is the truth for the situation you read about - it by no means becomes automatically valid for yours. Just because he cheated on MissForumGirl or she dumped MrForumGuy for whatever reason does not mean it is the same for you.

 

The big important fact here is that not all girls are the same - and not all guys are the same. Don't take someone's scenario as being applicable to your own.

[hello678]

I think cheating is a difficult one as there is 1000 pre set reasons for it. It could be momentary lapse, bad sex life in the relationship, revenge, because you didn't say good morning to your partner, daddy issues... who knows.

 

But I find alot on this board is to do with breakups and how to cope with them / get the ex back (rarely/never happens) and most relationships in this situation do follow a fairly set structure. You read over and over again the same questions and usually a standard form answer fits pretty well.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

I think a lot of people ask for advice on forums but then do whatever feels good for them in the moment. If people would actually take advice from forums they wouldn't be begging the dumper to take them back, they wouldn't get involved in FWBs despite the fact that many people caution them not to etc. People don't really take advice from online forums unless it corresponds to what they really wanted to do anyway. I would say the dependence is more on electronic means of communication within relationships rather than real face to face communication. Too many people hide behind text messaging and facebook. Relationships and fights and discussions are done via text messaging and facebook rather than with the person directly.

[ForumGuy]

The big important fact here is that not all girls are the same - and not all guys are the same.

This is mentioned at the tail end of advice on here sometimes, but most understand it as a given. Along the lines of what CAD mentions above, people often ask for advice and wait for someone to agree with them, even if 10 people have disagreed, to continue with what they really wanted to do in the first place. As far as being dependent on the internet, we are dependent on the quick access to information. The same thing has been going on since the beginning of time (the need for answers), only at a much slower pace.

 

The big important fact here is that not all girls are the same - and not all guys are the same. Don't take someone's scenario as being applicable to your own.

On the other hand, human nature is human nature and sometimes people do act similarly. I am not saying everyone is the same, but sometimes they are.

[Seraphim]

I think a lot of people ask for advice on forums but then do whatever feels good for them in the moment. If people would actually take advice from forums they wouldn't be begging the dumper to take them back, they wouldn't get involved in FWBs despite the fact that many people caution them not to etc. People don't really take advice from online forums unless it corresponds to what they really wanted to do anyway. I would say the dependence is more on electronic means of communication within relationships rather than real face to face communication. Too many people hide behind text messaging and facebook. Relationships and fights and discussions are done via text messaging and facebook rather than with the person directly.

 

There would also be LESS fights if people threw away the text message and did not have FB. There are more mis-communications that happen this way and ruin relationships in the blink of an eye over a misunderstanding that would have not happened in person. If the person is in your real life then deal with it in real life. If you have to deal with them electronically then you should make more allowances.

 

I agree too, people really do not take a lot of advice unless they truly want it.