If I tell her this, maybe she'll come back...

[joswsieg]

I'm thinking about moving to Chicago in 2-4 months and I want to tell my ex.

First of all, is it a good idea to even tell her or should I just stay NC?

Second, do you think that me telling her that I might move 10 hours away for good might change her mind about not wanting to be with me?

Any comments are welcome. Thanks for your help people! 0X

[slammin16]

I don't think this is a good idea.... it is manipulative and these tricks do not work. If she wants to come back it will have to be on her own free will, not because you are moving.

[catcountry]

I took a quick look through you previous posts and I hate to say it but...it is time for you to let this go and move on with your life. I understand how hard this is but you will thank yourself in the end. Go ahead and move...there is NO NEED to tell her about it. Keep your NC...it will help you in the end. Good luck in your new venture.

[indesign]

It may make you more desirable ( you want what you cannot have ) but you cannot logistically play out a long distance relationship when you did not even have one going in the same city. Think about it.

[blackhawks1287]

Don't tell her...thanks for telling me though...now we can hang and get you a new girl! I am a pretty good wingman not gonna lie...

[dramallama]

I'm thinking about moving to Chicago in 2-4 months and I want to tell my ex.

First of all, is it a good idea to even tell her or should I just stay NC?

Second, do you think that me telling her that I might move 10 hours away for good might change her mind about not wanting to be with me?

Any comments are welcome. Thanks for your help people! 0X

That's manipulative. If she doesn't want a relationship with you when you are in the same city, she won't want a LDR with you when you move away. Your life is none of her concern, so keep it that way. If she wanted to know what you were up to in a significant way, she would still be with you.

[jumper11]

Best not to tell her. I never told mine I was moving. It is more desirable when you dont tell them anyhow. Plus, yeah, don't manipulate. If she wants you she'll want you.

 

Mine I never told, then I kept seeing his friend on the bus, said I was moving but not where (this accidentally came out, kept seeing him), lo and behold this friend my ex never saw for over a year sees him, tells him, and yea. Ex ran back. BUT he wanted me beforehand. Moving wont change if she wants you.

 

If she doesnt want you when youre near and accessible, why would she want you when you afar? That's my logic.. Because if she doesn't want a local relationship, she won't as hell want a Long distance one.

[Chuck Bartowsk]

Agreed with all above, I live in California and I am going to move to Australia as soon as I can sell everything I own. I told my ex a year ago when we were still together that we should move there to raise a family, we were together for 8 years and she was exited at first but then she really didn't want to leave her family. 2 weeks ago on our last conversation (Been B/U for 2 months) I told her I was still gonna go and you would have thought I told her I was engaged already (even though she started a rebound 2 weeks after B/U) She was freaked. Haven't spoke to her since and don't intend to. Just go live your life as if your ex is a memory and nothing more. If she wants to come back, she will find you one way or another.