i was dumped in a mean way...please help me recover..first time poster

[jinxers]

recently i had a girlfriend of 3 months that i truly became close with, we cried, laughed, made love and became extremely close...however she travels a lot and decided that it was not in her best interest to be with someone who she cannot seem often..i understood....at first she said "i can always be friends with ex boyfriends" but i guess she saw how heartbroken and said i was and she said to me on the last day before she left for another business trip "i think its best for you to delete myself from your head" and the last time she saw me she was very distant and awkward

that word "delete" is ringing in my head and it hurts so much....is that a "mean" and hurtful way of dumping someone (i should put things in perspective though some people get cheated on which probably hurts the most)

or....is being told to "delete" actually a good thing cause she's basically saying but in other words "i see how hurt you are and i think no contact will help heal you and i was wrong not all people can be friends after dating"

 

a few questions

1) i wanna text or facebook message her saying being told to delete herself from my mind is cruel..but will that make me feel any better?

2) is being told to "delete" her from my life actually a good thing? would you guys consider that mean or cruel?

3) i keep thinking that she might look down upon me or think im crazy or weird cause i was hurt and clingy right after we broke up but after

she left for her business trip i started no contact for 2 weeks now and i dont expect her to ever contact me again, how do i get past that..by telling myself "i dont care what she thinks about me" or realizing that she probably doesnt think the worst of me (i never cheated said anything mean, 98% of our relationship was great until the very end)

 

thanks for your time

[DoGGYtREAts]

First sorry about what happened to ya buddy.

 

Now, I think she was just awkward and trying to "cut you loose". I know thats Never easy to take, but from what im reading it doesnt sound like she intended to be nasty or mean about it, albiet it was a poor choice of words, but the jist i get was she was just saying "this isnt working, we should probly let go and forget eachother".

 

Now your questions;

 

1. No i don't think it would help particularly.. Tho, it doesnt sound like shes being mean or playing games so i dont think it would be exceptionally harmful, Just be prepared that it could result in another awkward/Hurtful conversation.

2. No, Unless theres more to the story, i think it was just poor choice of words.

3. first you need to accept that its over (never easy- it comes with time), Beyond that remember what she thinks of you now really isnt worth pondering.

[Ms Darcy]

1. I don't think the delete comment was meant to be cruel and you will look like you are still hurt over the break up if you message her that. Do not message her.

2. I really don't read much into delete. It means she wants you to forget her. It is another way of saying that.

3. Who cares what she thinks? Break ups are hard but you are moving on and gonna be stronger.

[jinxers]

thanks guys....i think the most important thing is not caring what she thinks cause i always found that the hardest part after a breakup but if you truly convince

yourself "i dont care what my ex thinks of me im going to live my life to the fullest" than you can truly move on

[DoGGYtREAts]

Yup.

Believe me, Ive been there. My Ex played me like a banjo for almost 2 years because i couldn't stop caring. It DOES get easier with time and eventually you will make peace with it and it wont matter to you anymore