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Communication GAP


indesign

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Ok, so I have realized that one does not just sit back and watch the world go by, that if you want anything out of this life you have to get up and take part and participate. The only problem is that I think I may have an opportunity to get back with my ex, but the timing is just all out of sync. We have not talked in ages and I don't want to rush to push everything that I am thinking out into the open, and at the same time I don't want to wait for too long to make any conversation. What do you do, what's the best timing and HOW would you approach this problem? Thank you in advance for your replies.

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Just control the pace/rhyhtym of the communication, almost like the beginning of dating again. Start by keeping things light and short, and indirect. No heavy text/email volleys/6 hr phone convos...etc...when you feel pressure being applied just step back alittle and give him/yourself some space...of course this will only make him desire you more.

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My advice is to really start over. No remembering how he hurt you or you hurt him, no bringing up past issues (unless they really do show up as present issues and you are not just projecting fears).

 

Remember people change. You are not the same person and neither is he. Maybe you have each come a little more towards the other, but maybe you have slipped further. Either way, don't come into it with the foundation half built. You two are not the same builders.

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You have to learn this person all over again. The two of you are like strangers. Relationships cause people to evolve and so does time. neither of you are the same two people who met before. If you do get back together you need to approach it like dating someone new.

 

If you had issues in the past that caused the breakup you need to recognize them, acknowledge them or make them a subject of discussion. People do breakup and get back together sometimes months or years later. Prepare yourself mentally if you want to make it work.

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