Is being quiet so bad???

[mya]

I received feedback at work and I received mostly positive comments (I am hardworking, reliable, have done great work etc) but she kept saying that I am quiet and I should work on that. Basically she was referring to the fact that I was not talkative during meetings (but then again most students were not) and I think she thought I was not very talkative to the other workers. However, I felt like I did not have any time to talk to them and did not want to bother them doing work time. I cannot get this point from my head and now feel like I did a bad job. Can anyone relate?

[bulletproof]

I received feedback at work and I received mostly positive comments (I am hardworking, reliable, have done great work etc).

 

I cannot get this point from my head and now feel like I did a bad job. Can anyone relate?

 

You're only focusing on the one bad point. It was stated that you have done great work, so you are not doing a bad job. The feedback that you were too quiet seems to mean that they think you might have some good ideas and would like you to speak up. It also never hurts to be somewhat social with your coworkers because within reason, it can make a more pleasant work environment. I think it's a good thing that you were offered feedback like this because now you know what you need to work on. It can't hurt to learn to be more vocal as long as you are using that power wisely.

[mya]

Thanks for your comment. I know I'm the type of person who stresses on the negative feedback. I'm just feeling really bad because I've been getting "everything's great but I would like you to speak up more" for a while now and it's just upsetting. I feel like I put in the effort this year and still I get this type of feedback. I feel like the other students I worked with probably got all my positive feedback plus no negative feedback. I feel like crying. I feel like that's my personality, yeah I can change a bit, but not completely. I felt like I put in the effort and am still not good enough. Why does something that comes so simply to others so difficult for me!!!

[bulletproof]

Think about it- there are probably many things that you do in your life that come easily to you but not to others. Everyone has their struggles, and this just happens to be yours. This is one job, at one place. There may be jobs in your future that have a more comfortable environment for you to speak in, so don't stress about it too much. But it's okay to need improvement in some areas, that's how you grow. There are lots of ways to become more comfortable speaking publicly. Just do some research and see what's out there. You can't just say this is my personality, and I can't change, not if you want to go further in whatever career it is that you've chosen. Be open to changing and it will help you in all the areas in your life, not just your job. It may be true that you'll never be the most talkative person, but chances are you can at least improve a little bit.

[mya]

I wrote a few days back about my supervisor basically telling me I am a quiet person admist other positive feedback. Then when she was supposed to write down areas of improvement for me she asked me what I thought and I said "I guess speaking up more..." So basically she wrote that, but in a very nice way. Anyways at the end she told me if there was anything I disagreed with on the report to let her know and I said no. I have been dwelling on this for the past couple of days and basically I feel like maybe I should speak to her and tell her I am uncomfortable with that comment in my report since it did come from me and that I changed my mind. Would that be inappropriate? I do not really want it in the report because I feel like in this society quietness is often associated with a lot of negative qualities which I do not agree with (not assertive, shy, weak, not resourceful etc.). Also I feel like I was quiet but it did not significantly affect my work. Feedback is much appreciated.

[fergie 2]

The co-worker thing is by the by. But in meetings, it is always advisable to speak up. Not doing so can convey rudeness, a lack of knowledge, arrogance or timidness.

[NotSoDead]

Being quiet while at a meeting is one thing, but being quiet while working, now that should be praised. When you are talking you are being distracted, when you are at work your entire focus should be at your job, and your job is to help improve the company or business you work for. The worker ants don't socialize, they focus on the task at hand only, and they get their job done fast. I think that if people stopped talking at work and just focused on their jobs then efficiency would rise exponentially. When you are working it isn't about you, it is about the company or business you are working for. Your goal is to make where you work money, and chit chatting only diverts your attention from that goal. Making the job more enjoyable, like bulletproof said, is irrelevant. If you need something to make your job more enjoyable then that is your problem and you should probably find a new job. Socializing should be done when you are off work.

[mya]

I've realized that being social is very imp cause I ended up finding out what my coworker's ratings were and she got slightly higher ratings on the evaluation that I did. I really did not think she deserved to get higher ratings than me in most areas. I guess sucking up and being social helps A LOT. Sad but true. Now I know for next time.

[NotSoDead]

I've realized that being social is very imp cause I ended up finding out what my coworker's ratings were and she got slightly higher ratings on the evaluation that I did. I really did not think she deserved to get higher ratings than me in most areas. I guess sucking up and being social helps A LOT. Sad but true. Now I know for next time.

 

Sucking up is the last thing you want to do. Brown nosers are pathetic losers that have no self respect at all and deserve no respect.