Does she want to move in together?

[adonis_boy]

My girlfriend of 3 months started saying things that give me the hint that she might want to move in together. Some of them are:

 

- When she is saying goodbye, she hugs me and says "I wish you could be at my place all the time and I could always hug you."

- Out of a sudden, she starts telling me about her conversation with a close friend asking her if we have been already living together or not.

- Once she told me it would be great if I moved in with her for one week.

 

There are some issues I am concerned about.

 

Firstly, she pays 4 times the rent I am paying right now and if I move in with her and we share the expenses, I won't be able to afford paying for half of the rent.

 

Secondly, even though we have a nice relationship going on, I am afraid that we will be tired of each other, seeing each other every day. Seeing that we miss each other a lot more and have more to talk if we don't meet for a longer time, I worry that this "magic" will vanish.

 

I am also a bit independent type of guy that needs some alone time for himself and I get the feeling that I won't be able to have it if we move in together.

 

Even though I feel that it would be great to live with her and seeing her more often, I have some concerns to address to make sure before I can comfortably move in with her.

 

I would like to hear your experiences or thoughts on this. It will help a lot.

[mhowe]

Way way way too soon to move in together, especially considering the 3 major concerns you have. Listen to your head --- if you want, see her more often, but it sounds like she wants to play house ---

[hexaemeron]

Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too soon. Don't do it. The new hasn't worn off yet.

[CatsMeeoow]

Three months is WAY to early to be moving in together....

 

If you can't have a serious talk about finances... who makes how much... how will rent be split... groceries, cable, savings... If you don't want to be talking credit scores... then you are in no way to move in together. People think the hard part of moving in together is having to share the bathroom sink... but its not. Its the nitty gritty of did the light bill get paid on time which kills most relationships. How is she with handling money??? Do you really know??? I doubt in 3 months of dating you would know this.

[blackhawks1287]

Yeah too soon.

 

She also sounds very emotionally needy for the first three months in. Communicate with her though so you can keep it fresh and make it last. Don't let your worries and doubts etc build up...just communicate with her your intentions and what you expect and how you are feeling.

[annie24]

I agree.... sounds like it is too soon.

[Kitkat973]

I agree that it sounds too soon, and you have well-thought-out reasons for not wanting to make the move.

[regular joe]

Wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too soon. Don't do it. The new hasn't worn off yet.

I agree with this statement 100% and maybe would drag the way out a little longer even.

[adonis_boy]

I was wondering, when do you decide that you want to live with her? I have seen many of my friends that live together with bf/gf without the intent of getting married. What makes you decide that?

[abitbroken]

There is a difference between people saying romantic things "wouldn't it be sweet if it was just the two of us" or "someday we'll do x y and z", but I agree 3 months is too soon and if she is fishing, tell her so.

[delicous]

My ex and I moved in together too soon....We were not ready, he kindof pressured me and I didn't want to live with my family anymore so I took the plunge..We moved in 5 mnths into our relationship and things were really really really good, but the spark did die a yr later..Id suggest staying together longer and also id test her ability to be alone for a few days....Just to see if she freaks out or not. Me, I would but I have been trying to be more patient in my current relationship. I do like being in the same room as him whenever im at his place but never mentioned anything about living together...Its too soon and him and I may not even last. Anyways Id give it some long thought...But if she isn't asking, I wouldn't actually say anything about it quite yet. It has only been 3 mnths so take it easy and slow...see how it progresses=)