What to do I'm so hurt I want to die:(

[He hurt me bad]

I was together with my ex for 6 years. We share a child together. He was abusive, couldn't keep a job, and was always upset about something. We started arguing alot and I finally told him I love you I want to be with you but I'm sick of the way you treat me and my son. So he seemed upset and sad but I could sense some fakeness. We started talking again and I thought we were taking steps in the right direction. I guess not because on CHristmas Day he broke up with me for good. I was hurt devastated.

 

I told him I would like a second chance but I would give him time and space.I also asked if it was someone else he said no. Two days later he texts me and says I love you I miss you so much but I think about the goods and the bads. He also says I feel empty but free and if I could keep a stable job an treat you and nick right things would be different. Two weeks later he stops contacting me about our son. Two weeks later after that he tells me I'm talking to someone else but I don't really like her. Three weeks after that he tells me he loves her and there getting married.

 

So once a month I try to reach out to him about being civil for the sake of our son. I figured as long as I push my feelings a side we should get along since he's over me already. Well he tells me I hate you I regret you being the mother of my child. I never loved you I haven't loved you in the past year and a half(gf with him). I was hurt but I remained calm and I told him good luck with everything. Well my son starts coming home telling me daddy is mean to me daddy cussed at me daddy slapped me daddy said he doesn't love me. At first I ignore it but finally I call cps they don't do anything. Then I confront him about it and he starts arguing with me bringing up or past( he always brings up the past).

 

So after that argument I go strict no contact. So for the whole month of APril I go NC. I guess he was wondering what happened cus he starts calling and texting my mom consistently for weeks. My mom finally tells him Kim is not going to talk to you so whatever you need you will have to tell me. He says well I just wanted to let her know I have my own place. My mom says ok I'll rlay the message. That's same day he calls twice and asks my mom have you told her. My mom says no when I see her I'll tell her. The next day he texts have you told Kim yet and she says no when I see her I will tell her. So my ex treating nick bad gets worse because my son starts to say I hate my dad or he screams and cries when he has to go.

 

So I break no contact and I call him and he is actually nice to me( gf isnt there with him). He doesn't want to get off the phone but I had to go and he says I would like to finish our conversation , so I give him my new number but I keep him blocked because I'm not over him. Me having him blocked kept me from calling him. So few more weeks go by and he is still treating nick horribly. So I confront him again and he is so rude and cold to me( gf is in the car ) and he says by the way just to let you know my WIFE is PREGNANT. I was so hurt. I'm more hurt about her being pregnant because I was expecting at the beginnig of the year with his child. I decided not to keep it because he wasn't in my sons life and he told me he wasn't going to support him.

 

When I did finally tell him about the abortion he sound upset almost hurt. I said if I would have kept the baby would you have done right by me and my son and he said no. I said well I guess I made the right decision and he said yea you did. I've tried to be nice to him I go weeks without talking to him and I actually started doing alot better. I made alot of friends lost over 60 pounds cut my hair. I was feeling really good. But every time I communicate he always says or does something to hurt me. I feel he mistreats my son so he would have a way of communicating with me. Just like he gets upset because I have him blocked. He said I have him blocked because I'm angry and bitter but that's really not true. I blocked him as away of healing myself and because every time we talk he argues or talks about me or rubs his new relationship in my face. I've tried giving them Christian books and words of encouragement but nothing works.

 

He then allows his wife to text me saying a whole lot of stuff. Idk but I'm changing my number again and I'm moving out the state cus I just can't deal with it anymore. It also hurts cus everything he should have done with me and my son he's doing it with her. He got an apartment( but I think it's hers idk), he's had a stable job, and he seems to treat her well( even though my son told me they argue). Im just wondering if we will ever be able to have a parental relationship for our sons sake? Any suggestions? Thanks for letting me vent

[He hurt me bad]

When I say gf I mean his wife they are married and expecting their first child together. We broke up approximately 6 months ago and they've been together now for I guess 5 months.

[TheJerseyKid]

Paragraphs, please.

[superfox]

When I say gf I mean his wife they are married and expecting their first child together. We broke up approximately 6 months ago and they've been together now for I guess 5 months.

Your ONLY priority now is your son and his welfare. Get him out of that house or supervised visits only. Move on.

[catfeeder]

Maybe, if you don't push it. With him being defensive when you contact him, you'll get nowhere. Leave the contact up to him, but you'll need to unblock him if you want to encourage that. Keep all conversations strictly about visitation and nothing else. Be kind and ask him nothing personal--he'll only perceive it as prying. Don't push the Christian material, it comes off as holier than thou and that's infuriating.

 

The other way is to see a lawyer. Have the lawyer manage your communication. Discuss any concerns you have about your son's visits with your lawyer and ask for advice.

 

Either way, he's likely to pipe down over time if you pull back, quit the phone blocking game, and communicate only in a calm, businesslike manner.

[He hurt me bad]

I don't pry I don't ask questions I leave them alone. I don't bother them I block him because when we do talk he only brings up the past or his relationship, rarely is it ever about my son so Idk. I blocked her because she has no right texting me. I don't talk to her I don't even know her. He keeps saying I'm angry and bitter which is not true. I don't bring him up I don't ask questions I'm just upset cus y'all make it sound like it's my fault for him acting like this and me blocking him is not a game. That's my way of not having to deal with his behavior. If someone called you to argue would you let them continue or would you block them. I guess, what's the point of posting only to get criticized?

[He hurt me bad]

I am moving on I've made friends, I cut my hair, I lost weight I'm fine. I actually don't think about him anymore, well not until he told me they got married and were expecting and I deny even asked he just told me.

[catfeeder]

It's not criticism, it's an answer to the question you asked. If you can look at all the suggestions and say, 'check, I did that,' "check, I do that...' then the only thing left to pursue is a lawyer and the best patience you can muster over t.i.m.e.

 

Chances are, he's just grandstanding for the new girl, and for some reason he thinks it makes him look 'good' to her to ramp up cruelty toward you. That's a warped mentality, so our suggestions can only address the safest, most business-like way to conduct the transfers of your son. Beyond that, keep your cool and do all else through a lawyer.

 

It hasn't even been a year yet. People mellow. Head high.